Sorry,
I agree with all of the above and would add a couple of comments.
Sounds like you think there is some 'history' between you and the BU. If you think so then there is. You need to get over that and forget whatever history there was.
Umpires are never keen on having a coach tell them what to do. NEVER. Just as coaches are never keen on having an official tell them what to do. NEVER. You can't tell an umpire to clean off the rubber without creating some ire. You can't demand/tell an umpire to address you a particular way without compounding that aggravation. And surely you recognize that you can't tell an umpire he made a bad call, (even if he did - although in this case there was no tag, purportedly for safety reasons BUT THAT IS YOUR JUDGEMENT and not the umpire's. And it is only the umpire's judgement that counts.) without exacerbating the situation even further.
Essentially, you told him he made a bad call when you asked for the rubber to be cleaned off.
"Rubber"... strike one
"bad tag call"... strike two
"Call me coach"... you're gone whipper snapper. History or no history. Some umpires may tolerate this or not feel a need to deal with it. Veterans will likely run you - even a head coach, with that last comment, stands a good chance of getting a ticket for the bus to home.
You might never receive respect from and umpire, especially if you don't give respect. Telling the umpire how to do his job will never gain respect. Given the "history" you will likely need to make the first concessions and show your respect for the umpire's job... and you may have to do this for a long time without any return respect. But such is life. Good luck!
