[CYO Butch]

What kind of point are you trying to make? If the point is that you think a call was blown, you probably don't need to/shouldn't even worry about trying to make it, at least not in direct conversation with the official. The call isn't going to get changed no matter what you say or how you say it, so a single "Common ref, how can you call that a hand check?" (or whatever) should MORE than suffice. If you have a legitimate question/concern about a rule interpretation, ask a question during a time out. Even the worst official you will come across knows more about the rules than 95% of us coaches, so don't assume you can tell them what to do.

In my experience, AAU officiating can be pretty strained. The teams generally are paying some big bucks to be there, and the officials are aware of it. The officials also don't usually have very strong game mangement to back them up when coaches get out of hand, and I've seen some pretty bad situations arise. The bottom line, though, is I've never seen any coach get better treatment after p*ssing off the officials.

As for hot buttons, anything directed personnally at the official is BAD, as is profanity. Constant whining doesn't work. "Call it both ways" is a non-starter. "Come on, he went over the back there" might cause them to chuckle inside but won't buy you any credibility. "How come we've got 12 fouls and they only have 3?" is another comment to avoid. Basically, anything that questions their integrity will at the very least get them mad, and may well get you T'd immediately.