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Old Wed Nov 26, 2003, 01:59pm
rainmaker rainmaker is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2000
Location: Portland, Oregon
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Around here, CYO is the worst ball to work, because so many people have attitudes. I suppose that doesn't have to apply everywhere, but there are a lot of "Little League Dads" and "Stage Moms" in the world, so I expect you'll find a least a few.

Definitely don't let ANYONE know it's your partner's frist games. The best way to "take care" of your partner, is to show the coaches that you respect said partner. If the coach questions a call that your partner made, say, "It looked like a good call to me." If there's no way it could have been a good call, "Coach, ask HIM what he saw. I was busy watching your post player." or "He had a better angle than you or I." In these statements, you're also giveing the coach some language to start a reasonable conversation with your partner. It may not help, but it could.

Be sure that the first thing you say as you walk off the court together is very warm and positive, even if you have to be extremely vague, (I've heard a lot of these!!), such as, "Man, you were working hard!" "You were a lot more relaxed by the end." "That last call was terrific" After the positive statement, state two or three things for partner to work on. State them in an action-oriented way, with no judgement or predictions for the future -- "You need a stronger whistle" not "You'll never go anywhere if you don't learn to whistle better". "Study Rule 9 carefully, and read through the Case Book for Rule 9 several times." not "Haven't you gone over violations yet?" Then give a very good warm statement at the end. "You will get better fast, if you keep this up!" "I've been honored to work with you." Or, if you really liked him a lot, and want to keep in touch, "Let's work together again" or "call me and let's discuss the travelling rule."

Give at least three positive statements during the game. If necessary, lie. That is, lie in a way that could be self-fulfilling in a positive direction. "You have such a calm, collected demeanor" "You make it look like fun." "I heard a couple of parents say good things." "That coach can be a real problem, but you handled him fine."

Answer any questions honestly, but tactfully. "Did I call it too tight?" (He blew 14 fouls in the first half on each team). "Well, there were a few there that I would have let go..." "Your shirt looks good, but pressing your pants would help."

Never say always. Never say never.

Try to have fun yourself. It's quite contagious.

Sorry to go on and on. My "newbie" days are still fresh in my memory, and I'm giving you what I wanted.
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