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I can remember the time not so long ago (let's see, two or three weeks?) when I was in your partner's position. In fact, several times. I wasn't in a varsity game, but otherwise, could have been the same. Here are some things I appreciated that partners said to me:
That was a great travel call. Lots of vets miss that call, cause they are watching for the shot instead of focusing on the feet. Now, what did you see on that last block?
(To the coach) She called it a violation, its a violation. It doesn't matter if you've never seen that called before. Sit down, coach, let's get on with the game. (This was one of those obscure calls, but I knew I was right because I had just been reading the rules book at breakfast at that particular place. My partner thought I was dead wrong, but defended me to the bitter end. This impressed me tremendously with the responsibility I had to be a stickler in my study and be sure I am right 99% of the time. I owe it to my partner.)
People handle that call lots of different ways, but what Howard likes is ... (Howard is our benevolently despotic assignor, without whose attention no one evr moves up)
Don't let the coach get under your skin -- even if you're wrong, you're the ref and not him.
And my all time favorite for partnership came a day when I shouldn't even have been on the floor. My baby was being diagnosed with several very bad chronic problems, my grandmother was in intensive care dying, and my car wasn't running right. I tried to get out of my games but couldn't. About half way through the second quarter, my pertner said, "Are you okay?" I burst into tears. He hid me from the coaches and spectators, and said, "Okay, you just run up and down and I'll do the calling." When a coach yelled at me, he said, "Coach, she has won awards this year for her work, so I wouldn't be yelling a whole lot more." It is true I had won an award at camp this summer, but I sure wasn't living up to it that day. My partner really bailed me out of a bad jam, and I will never forget his friendship and compassion. Are you listening, Dan Gresham?
To summarize, Defend Your Partner to the Death. Correct Gently, and Sympathize with Emotional Problems (whether your partner is male or female, new or veteran, great or lousy.)
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