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Old Mon Dec 31, 2018, 12:21pm
RefsNCoaches RefsNCoaches is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: Indiana
Posts: 163
Update on the Big Fella...

Got to stop by his house yesterday afternoon and pay a short visit to him, his Wife and his 3 daughters that officiate. I knew going in that his days are very limited.... walking in and seeing this 6'7" frame that jogged the courts officiating at 230 lbs down to what had to be 175-180 lbs, now propped up in a recliner under blankets, with his head being held up by one of those airplane neck pillows and his IVs and the other tubes coming from the body of this gentle giant, that are essentially sustaining his life at this point... was heart wrenching.

His once booming voice that commanded respect from coaches, officials and parents in the stands at our youth leagues was a fraction of itself as his face lifted with a smile as I walked in the room and heard him say "Hey Mike, thanks for stopping by". When I asked him how he was doing TODAY? He replied, "I'm here with family...but I'm not going to make it, brother...I'm just waiting for my call home".

We chatted a little about what's going on with his condition and he said they haven't given him a time table but his wife sharing that they now have 7 days of "nutrition" left for home stay (he's being fed via IV)...I know that it won't be much longer and once hospice is brought in, it's about minimizing pain and maximizing comfort...It's sad that nutrition takes a back seat.

I let him know I appreciated him not only as a Man but as fellow official that helped me out when I came to his part of the woods. His reply was, "Hey, you're welcome...I trusted you and you never let me down on or off the court...I just wish we would have schedule more games together like we talked about...but life got in the way of that".

We both shed a tear at that point and I told him that "I appreciate hearing that and I know we'll be on a court again together someday soon"...he smiled and nodded.

My hope now is that his time left and his transition is an easy and painless one...You can see he's suffering and I know from dealing with hospice when my mom passed two years ago, his family is also. Wrestling with when to make that hospice call is hard, especially when your loved one seems coherent at times. The sad reality is that him passing will likely now be a blessing for those that care about him. I know it will for me and feel it will be for him and his family knowing what the final outcome is going to be...just not when that will be.

I'll raise a glass of some adult beverage in his honor tonight to bid farewell to 2018 and and I'll hit that whistle hard and confident on Thursday and Friday night this week at my games. The Big Fella would wouldn't expect it be any other way...

I'll miss this guy on the floor but life will miss him more. :-(
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