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-   -   Way to go, coach! (https://forum.officiating.com/softball/45779-way-go-coach.html)

NCASAUmp Mon Jun 23, 2008 10:21pm

Way to go, coach!
 
So last week, I had this player in a recreational co-ed SP league who kept fussing over judgment calls. I gave him a couple of warnings. Finally, I had enough, and I tossed him. The coach asked him after the game why he was tossed, and the player made up some BS reason to sound like he was innocent.

A couple nights later, the coach and the player were having a couple of beers, and the coach brought up the ejection again. The beer had loosened up the player's tongue a little too much, and he said, "well... that's not exactly how it happened." The player confessed to the fussing, as well as a few other things I didn't hear.

Coach suspended the player himself for one game on top of what the league gave him... Just for lying to him. Go, coach! :D

wadeintothem Tue Jun 24, 2008 12:05am

I dont think I mentioned it but I tossed my first JO catcher (18U) a few weeks ago. She just wouldnt stop yapping, questioning calls, literally asked me "where did that one miss" on a HBP, framing obvious balls for a long time.. a horrible attitude. Hell, I felt like my DD was catching during a moody time. I finally told her "girl, I've had enough". She stood up, took her mask off turned toward me and said "dont call me girl" .. well she went, of course the coach went within a few mins after that.. and he went crying to everyone under the sun. I had to listen to some BS from Umpire Mgmt about how I toss too quick, etc... but this weekend I had that catcher again. She apologized saying she didnt know what had gotten into her and how very sorry she was. She did a great job back there and had a good attitude. I felt good about that and was glad she acknowledged it.

azbigdawg Tue Jun 24, 2008 04:34am

Quote:

Originally Posted by wadeintothem
I dont think I mentioned it but I tossed my first JO catcher (18U) a few weeks ago. She just wouldnt stop yapping, questioning calls, literally asked me "where did that one miss" on a HBP, framing obvious balls for a long time.. a horrible attitude. Hell, I felt like my DD was catching during a moody time. I finally told her "girl, I've had enough". She stood up, took her mask off turned toward me and said "dont call me girl" .. well she went, of course the coach went within a few mins after that.. and he went crying to everyone under the sun. I had to listen to some BS from Umpire Mgmt about how I toss too quick, etc... but this weekend I had that catcher again. She apologized saying she didnt know what had gotten into her and how very sorry she was. She did a great job back there and had a good attitude. I felt good about that and was glad she acknowledged it.


I wouldnt call her "girl".... "young lady" tends to get their attention...."Girl" can actually be seen as a slam....would you call a male "boy" ( I hope not...)

IRISHMAFIA Tue Jun 24, 2008 07:04am

Quote:

Originally Posted by azbigdawg
I wouldnt call her "girl".... "young lady" tends to get their attention...."Girl" can actually be seen as a slam....would you call a male "boy" ( I hope not...)

Young lady may be appropriate if she acted like a young lady. From the tone offered in the scenario, she wasn't. :)

An 18U female is a girl. An 18U male is a boy. It is about age and gender, nothing else.

wmblue Tue Jun 24, 2008 07:18am

Quote:

Originally Posted by wadeintothem
I finally told her "girl, I've had enough". She stood up, took her mask off turned toward me and said "dont call me girl" .. well she went, of course the coach went within a few mins after that.. and he went crying to everyone under the sun. I had to listen to some BS from Umpire Mgmt about how I toss too quick, etc...

Are you seriously confused as to why you received this reaction? Never speak to a player in a condescending attitude no matter how "bad" you think they're being.

Sounds like a thicker skin is in order. That and taking a Verbal Judo class or reading the book.

wadeintothem Tue Jun 24, 2008 07:51am

Quote:

Originally Posted by wmblue
Are you seriously confused as to why you received this reaction? Never speak to a player in a condescending attitude no matter how "bad" you think they're being.

Sounds like a thicker skin is in order. That and taking a Verbal Judo class or reading the book.

Nope, not gonna coddle her. She needed to go, she knew she needed to go, she went and end of story. Not gonna play verbal judo games any other "keep her in the game" games you are advocating.

CecilOne Tue Jun 24, 2008 08:51am

No need for girl, lady, young lady, etc. Address by number or position.

Dakota Tue Jun 24, 2008 09:05am

Quote:

Originally Posted by CecilOne
No need for girl, lady, young lady, etc. Address by number or position.

I was about to say the same thing. I don't doubt wade when he said she needed to go, but I do not address players by anything other than jersey number or position (catch, batter, runner, short, etc.).

I had an 18U catcher starting to get herself into trouble with the attitude a couple of years ago. I said to her, "Catch, if you want to see the end of this game you'd better get control of yourself." No back talk, and she did settle down.

CecilOne Tue Jun 24, 2008 09:45am

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dakota
I was about to say the same thing. I don't doubt wade when he said she needed to go, but I do not address players by anything other than jersey number or position (catch, batter, runner, short, etc.).

I had an 18U catcher starting to get herself into trouble with the attitude a couple of years ago. I said to her, "Catch, if you want to see the end of this game you'd better get control of yourself." No back talk, and she did settle down.

As long as you were "about to say the same thing". I'll go one step further and say I avoid ultimatums.

IRISHMAFIA Tue Jun 24, 2008 10:43am

Quote:

Originally Posted by CecilOne
No need for girl, lady, young lady, etc. Address by number or position.

Very good point.

Dakota Tue Jun 24, 2008 11:10am

Quote:

Originally Posted by CecilOne
As long as you were "about to say the same thing". I'll go one step further and say I avoid ultimatums.

It was not an ultimatum ("One more word and you're gone...") but general advice with no specific trip point identified.

LMan Tue Jun 24, 2008 12:55pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by IRISHMAFIA
Young lady may be appropriate if she acted like a young lady. From the tone offered in the scenario, she wasn't. :)

An 18U female is a girl. An 18U male is a boy. It is about age and gender, nothing else.


Don't be sexist....broads hate that.


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