Rookie Season

[SC Ump]

My handle, SC Ump, is from 15+ years of softball and baseball. This year I decided to give football a try... as umpire here, too.

Thanks much in part to this board, I had a blast and a very successful year. Starting with a very good test score, I was assigned 19 sub-varsity games and 9 varsity ones on Friday night.

Last Thursday, at our end of year banquet, I was awarded our local association's rookie of the year award. I just wanted to say thank you to this board and all the support you supplied.

With tongue firmly in cheek, here are the top ten things I learned as a rookie football official:

10. If you mark off a penalty the wrong way, the crowd will let you know immediately.

9. "Tricked" is when they convince you the new guy drives the crew to the game; "gullible" is when they also convince you to buy the post-game beverages.

8. (Especially for the umpires) Watch the game, not the cheerleaders. http://bellsouthpwp.net/d/t/dte120360/blackeye.htm

7. If defensive linemen continue to refer to you as "Coach", (as in "Coach, the other team's holding") make sure your explanations are simple.

6. There is no difference from sport to sport when it comes to coaches saying, "They let us do it last game."

5. Your crew will never let you live it down if you accidentally throw a flag at a fumble instead of your bean bag.

4. "Working on a wing" has nothing to do with umpires at post-game Hooter events.

3. "Back steak stake" has nothing to do with umpires at post-game Outback events.

2. If you think you're sleek, check out the 11:00 local sports, with the film of you waddling down the field.

And the number one thing I learned as a rookie football official...

1. To avoid embarrassment, make sure you understand what is meant when your white hat tells you he needs his balls dried.