I’ve just recently finished reviewing my 2004 journal. I feel that this year was a real break through for me although I also see I have lots to improve on. There’s one thing that really stands out in regards to my communication skills and helped improve the whole complexion of my game, especially in preventive officiating.
It came to mind at the beginning of the season, that outside of game management the players useally only hear from Officials in a negative situation. We’re out there watching for fouls, unsafe play unsportsmanship conduct ECT. When we see any of this we penalize them or at least give them a worrying.
All in all it seemed to me that this builds more of a negative relationship then anything else. What I wanted to do was come up with some things that would improve my player/official relationship. Because 90% of the time I’m either working Umpire or WH, I’ve got good opportunity for communicating with the players both during and after the down. What I would do as WH during a passing down is say things like “don't hold, don’t hold”. Or on a running play if I saw a block that might have the appearance of a BIB I’d say “good block, good block”. Then after a down where I’d observe a good block that sprung a runner for a gain I’d say “ Number 32, great block!”. Or after a good tackle “ Number 56, good stop”. It’s great seeing the look on a players face when you call his # and he’s expecting a chewing out and then you give him a complement instead. Now you’re calling attention to him for the positive things he’s doing instead of calling out his # for a foul that just hurt his team. After a while I found out was I was throwing less flags, players were fouling less, coaches were *****ing less, and all the player’s attitudes seemed to improve in regards to the officials working the game. I also found my attitude improved and I was having more fun. And isn’t that the reason we’re out there? Anyway, just thought I’d share. Sorry for rambling on.
OH YAH, I LOVE THIS GAME!

Although I don't say "don't hold" I do compliment players on good hits, runs, blocks, and especially not late hits on the QB. They definitely notice and appreciate it. I also will tell them if they were close on a late hit, I need to see fingers, or keep their hands inside the frame.
I know at a coaches panel at a clinic I attended, the coaches said they really appreciate positive communication with their players.

JN - good post. I learned something from that I might add. One thing I didn't do was keep a journal of the year. This was my 1st year at referee and had 2 rookies on my crew and we had a very successful season. With the level of experience we had you might expect that we should have a shoddy year at best. I did my best to keep everyone prepared with good pre-games, etc. which contributed to success. But recording stuff helps you retain even the little things that perhaps happened in week 2 for example. While everything is fresh in my mind I think I'll use the immediate offseason time to record everything I'm thinking and share it with everyone in the offseason so we can be even better next year. Excellent idea...thanks!

Good idea on the journal. The only thing I keep is a book which I write down any game situations that happened (like the ones posted on this board) and what the ruling on the field was. Then I go to the rule book and get a reference. Sometimes we were wrong, but most of the time we were right. This helps me remember complicated rules in case the situation happens again.