I know I read it on this board, but am to busy to source the right person. But I got this from here and I wanted to pay my respects:

Walking to basesline before the second half. Fan holds out his eye glasses. I look at them and say "What are those for?"
"They are for you."
"Why?"
"To help you see the game"
"Why? They certainly haven't helped you."
Mysterious person behind "I guess he told you, now maybe you'll shut up!@"

Priceless. Didn't hear a negative peep from them the rest of the night!!

Had a Head Coach the other night who had a real pain in the a** assistant, so I pulled the "Batman and Robin" line on him...worked like a charm (even got a laugh out of him).

My thanks too, to whomever came up with that one!

Handling a coach?
 

Hey, let me ask a question.

First of all, I just starting getting some varsity games. I did my first three-man set about three weeks ago. If was a large Class 6A school versus a large 2A school. Were thunking this is going to be a blowout. This particular 2A always finishes thier season with the daunting task of a 6A team to prepare themselves for the playoffs.
Well the coach for the 6A school knows my partners and obviously doesn't know me. Everytime he questioned something he got all over me. He would ask why I didnt see a foul that my partners called or why his team was outshot at the foul line 37-10, stuff like that. He was even more upset when his team lost the game they most definately should have one.
I see this particular coach everywhere now. At the school if I'm there for a girls game, other schools games, or even just out in public, but no matter where he always gives me this nasty look and won't say anything to me. Do I brush this off, what do I do?? Any advice for the future?
Did I get all the heat becasue he didn't know me and he knew my partners?

That's exactly why he acted that way toward you...and you handle it by ignoring it...be professional and polite, but who cares what he thinks and how he acts at other venues...unless he is coaching the game you are reffing, he's just another fan...don't worry about it, do your job, go home to your family, and stop worrying about him...

Re: Handling a coach?
 

What about in black helicopters?

That guy obviously has a few issues with keeping things in perspective. That is his issue, not yours. And approaching him cannot help in any way - he clearly is not able to control his emotional reactions. He needs to get over it, but you can't help him with that!

Exactly! http://www.stopstart.freeserve.co.uk/smilie/thumbs.gif

When you're the rookie on the crew, you're going to catch $hit. My third varsity assignment, I had a coach yelling at me from the gitgo. During a dead ball, I explained to him that he could stand and coach but i would not let him stand and yell at me all night. He yelled, "You get paid for me to yell at you!"

Then I sat him down.

He's never been out of line with me since.