Irrational Coach....Complains about every call
 

Just throwing this out there....I am of the belief that Everyone could improve on dealing with an irrational coach. (If thats possible) I worked a Varsity Tournament Boys 2A, (2 Person Mechanics) and it seems in the smaller schools, coaches want to act like minature Bobby Knights. Here is the situation: I worked 2 games, 2nd game was a Double Over Time. Great Game. My partner and I was supposed to be replaced by 2 other officals for the 3rd game but no one showed up so we stayed to work it. I will admit I was a little tired, but I felt good enough to work the next game. Admittedly, When a person is tired, they are a little less tolerant of coaches complaining, etc. We worked the game and one of the coaches team was losing and the coach complained, a lot through out the game. In the 3rd period, I had enough and went over to the Coach and said, "Coach, ENOUGH! I don't want to hear any more from you! Told the book to put an Official Warning in the book and told my partner, This coach has been warned. We finished the game and to my bad luck, my locker room was locked and it was right by the team that just lost. This Coach saw me in the hall way and looked at me talking to somene else and said, "I WANT HIS NAME". Out of character, I said my name is....And Spelled it for him. I know this was totally unprofessional and I truely believe had it been the 2nd game, Would not have happened. I got in my locker room, took my shower and got dressed. When I went out to leave, I saw the coach. I guess he had calmed down and I did. I went over to him and said, "Coach, I'd like to apologize for being unprofessional. I know I was wrong but if you look at the tape, I was in position on every call. Agree or not, I worked hard in your game. Anyway, I know the right answer was to say nothing , but it is what it is. As Tony Stigliano says, "You can't Mis-Quote Silence"! Just curious if anyone else has ever had a situation close to this? I'd love to hear your input......

If he was doing it constantly I would not have given him the courtesy of a warning - I would have whacked him.

I am fairly tolerant of coaches and don't let many get under my skin but OTOH I don't let them question every call I make in the game. I will give a T where one is needed.

I have a game tonight with a team where the coach is vocal about calls. I dread it to be honest but I will let him complain as long as (1) it is fairly infrequent (2) has no profanity or (3) stays in his box. If any of those three conditions are broken I will give him a T; however, my hope is that I don't have to.

Robby

I used to allow them to complain throughout the game too, but it's better to nip that in the bud. I dont know if its a local thing, but we dont put coaches warnings in the book.

I dont think approaching a coach after a game is a wise move... especially a losing coach. JMO

For which of the four reasons?

"You want MY NAME?!?! Don't you like your own name? Do you know how confusing it would be if we both had the same name? You'd have to get a new drivers license and everything. Geez."

Sounds like you should've addressed the coach well before the third quarter. Certainly, your first effort to address a coach who's "complaining" shouldn't be to issue an ultimatum and then write it in the book (which serves no purpose but to inflame and to delay the game).

It also sounds like a technical foul may have been warranted at some point, as well.

As far as waiting in the hallway, it happens. I probably would've walked away from the door, though, until the key was found or until the coach was inside his locker room.

This warning is but in the book so your supervisor or the state knows that you warned him and he knew he behavior was not appropriate. Some officials do it and some don't. In the women's college league I work every one of them wants us to put a warning on a coach in the book.

I might apologize for my outburst by the locker room but I am not going to justify my performance to him like you did...no way!

freddie, I have no problem with your warning. Maybe it could have come earlier, maybe not, only you know that. But yes, you didn't handle things right in the post game. You should have ignored him, but you didn't, so oh well. And I wouldn't have apologized for giving my name and spelling it out. I would have just walked by him.

All-in-all, not the worse that could have happened. A learning experience, but no need to beat yourself up about any of it, IMHO.

I hindsight I'd never approach him to apologize and certainly not for spelling your name. After you slept on it, if you felt compelled to apologize for something the timing is much better and probably communicated better through an email, although I'd be careful what you put into writing.

The game is over and so are his and your duties. If he can't handle his emotions there is no need for you to jump into his hole. To me, approaching him to apologize is in a way admitting you were wrong from get go and possibly dousing gas on the fire. Just forget it, I'm sure he did a few hours after. This of course is all hindsight and just my thoughts.

So he got your name, what's the worse that can happen? He'll mark you off and you'll never have to listen to his winey A$$ anymore!

freddie_g... you promote what you permit. if you allow specific behaviors to continue, then you are, in essence, saying that those behvaviors are acceptable....

Your name is in the official book. If his scorekeeper was adept, he would have copied it from the official book. Sounds like an ABS tech was warranted. The more you talk to coaches, the more opportunity to say things you might regret. You might be in touch with your assignor as working 3 V games in a row with a crew of 2 is a lot different than working 3 or 5 AAU games in a row.

W-e-a-s-e-l-p-a-n-t-s. :)

Nicki Flippers:cool:

Frank-N-Furter, Dr. Frank-N-Furter ...
 

Midway through the first quarter, if not sooner, you could have said something like, "Coach, if you have a specific question, I'll be happy to answer it when I have time. But I can't allow you to continue the running commentary." Say it quietly, and say it early before tempers get inflamed.

Probably let it go too far. Hard to turn it around if you let it go so long.

:confused: For what? I'd make sure my partner(s) knew the coach was warned so they could take appropriate action if needed, but there is support to write a warning for unsportsmanlike conduct in the book.

I'd file a report on game management not being available to let you into your room. We should not have to run around the gym in our uniform after a game to find them. Things like this happen then.

Mistake on your part. No reason to initiate contact. A lot of things could happen, very few of which are positive. What if it went south from there? It looks like you baited him. Get in, get done, get out. Of course, this is just my opinion...

Irrational Coach...Complains about everyTHING
 

The more I think about this thread, the more I think it mirrors my life!:eek:

The difference is you chose to be with her "til death doeth thou parteth."

I am of the opinion that you dont wait until the thir quarter.

If they are whining on every call, I normally tell a coach they have to pick and choose their battles. They usually get it. If they dont then tell them youve heard enough.

it is interesting that when you look at the psychology of the game, when coaches actaully focus on their team and coaching that their teams do better. I believe that when they whine about every call their kids are listening to and they start to think they are being screwed and dont focus on the plays and execution of the plays.

I have to agree with this. Back in my younger days I would allow coaches to do things like this because I didn't want to interrupt the game, draw attentions to myself, yada, yada, yada. All it got me was more a$$ chewin's. I don't put up with it anymore, and the coaches whose games I work know this from the get-go. If they have a question, politely and professionally ask. If there is a complaint, share it, politely and professionally. If a coach raises their voice to yell at me or my co-officials, that is IMMEDIATELY addressed. It may different for others, but I don't have much "stuff" from coaches anymore. And, for what it's worth, I give fewer technical fouls now than at any point in my career. Just sayin' . . .

Irrational Coach.....
 

I'd like to thank everyone for their advice. Honestly, It was totally out of my character to respond like I did, but It is what it is. I will learn from it and ensure to address the coach earlier if I feel he is starting to effect my concentration. Of course,,,,,It is so easy to say "I'd do this or I'd do that.....until your in the situation. I will sure attempt to keep my cool in the future should a situaion arise......Thanks to all that have responded. I hope you all get to work as the Referee in the NCAA Championship Game.....lol

I doubt very many of us want to get scrutinized on National TV.

Look At Me I'm Sandra Dee ...
 

I hate just being on the local cable access channel.

Game O' The Month ...
 

Our local board has come up with a new idea. A "Game of the Month" where all those officials not working that night would be invited to sit in the bleachers with our interpreter crew and observe the game, with the interpreters providing rule, and mechanics, "play by play" critique.

This was presented to us at our local meeting on Sunday. Those sitting around me, all top notch officials, asked about the proposed date, so that they could block it out on Arbiter.

I like that...EXCEPT, shorten it a little:

"Specific Question...Yes...Running Commentary...No!"

...so you're not "that guy".;)

Black line, all the way around!

Didn't Check To See If He Was Wearing A Belt ...
 

Actually had a partner say that this past weekend. Well, he actually said, "yellow line", but that was close enough. Seriously. It really happened.

I would have
 

Did you laugh at him?

True. I had a coach, not really causing a huge issue, but going on and on. She had just started to become vocal in the game when there happened to be a tie-up right in front of her. Boy did she jump on that and was going nuts. I guess I didn't blow my whistle fast enough for her. She was all over me for it after I had, I walked past her, nodded to her and calmly said I got it. She was cool with me after that, no issues.

A friend of mine the other day said I had "a way with people". Hopefully I can harness it for on the floor with coach interactions once I get back in the game.