As it was reported to me.....
 

Yesterday, there were rec games going on in the gym next to where I was working mine. Between games, the other refs came over to socialize. One of them told me that at the end of their first game (a 7th grade boys 30 point blowout) a parent said to him, "That was the worst refereed game I've ever seen!" The official replied, "So this was the first game you've ever seen then?"

The guy didn't get it but his kid laughed. Chalk one up for the good guys.

BTW - my reply would have been, "Coming from a real expert like you, that means a lot". I told this to the other ref and he said he'd write that one down. :)

I'm writing those comments down as well and keeping it in my pocket any time I officiate :)

If you're keeping track, one of my all-time favorite from my buddy, the Immortal Dave:

Parent after a game: "Refs like you two is ruining the game."
Dave: "No, you're wrong."
Parent: "It's an opinion. How can it be wrong?"
Dave: "It's supposed to be - "Refs like you two are ruining the game. If you're going to be a jerk, at least use proper grammar."

"But tomorrow is another day."

or

"I agree, most games this bad are not refereed."

or


"I agree, most games this bad don't have referees."

:p

Years ago, I had a coach tell me and my partner after a game that he thought it was the "worst refereed game ever". I told him that would be impossible. He asked why it would be impossible. I replied that the odds were too great to have the "worst refereed game ever" and the "worst coached game ever" occur in the same game.

He just stared for about 10 seconds, then turned and left.

I'd think something snarky like that, but would never EVER say it.

Nonetheless...that was pretty freaking funny, Padgett!

Certain things, you can get away with if you've been working the same rec league for two or three centuries.

If you say so. :)

And are on the Board!

My standard response to such comments is simply "Thank you."

However, last year I worked some 3rd-4th grade rec games, where a qualified ref would partner with a high school rec center employee...actually works pretty well. It was a generally very low key, let the kids have fun, call only the really gross stuff kind of league with lots of very supportive family watching...a good environment. Unfortunately, one "coach" was a real piece of work and complained about everything. I ignored her for the most part, but I finally T'd her up and told her that she had to sit down and remain silent for the rest of the game. It worked, though she fumed till the end. Afterward, the other qualified ref (from the other court) and I were sitting in the lobby changing our shoes when the "coach" walked up. She complimented the other guy on how good of an official he is and then contemptuously told me she hoped I never worked one of her games again. I just looked at her and said "M'am, I hope so too." She seemed stunned and walked away. The other guy and I just laughed out loud.

Those are the coaches I enjoy working with again, and would ask for quite frankly. One thing I realized after working those games yesterday was how good they are for getting stuff you don't see often (disconcertion, mouthy kids, etc) that keep you on your toes.

You can have her! :)

Earlier this seson, as we left the gym following a 7G game, a parent on the front row said, "You know you missed a great game!" Without missing a beat, my partner responded, "Really? Where was it?"

"I aslo missed bell bottoms and parachute pants, but mostly I miss original referee insults."

A few years ago, I was finishing my last rec game of a shift while my buddy, the Immortal Dave, was waiting to begin his. It was during a timeout in the 4th quarter that he yelled from the stands, "Hey Padgett - are you pregnant?” I ignored him but he yelled it again. I finally turned and said, "OK, Dave, I'll bite. No, I'm not pregnant, why do you ask?” Dave says, "Because you missed three periods!"

Not much you can say at that point.

Circa 2007...

"Don't worry, ma'am, "I've got a Tivo!""

If someone says it during a game, "What you've got a TV behind you?"

Or, "I know, but they don't have a jumbo-tron in here."

Or, I know, but I got assigned to work here."

There are however some very fine parents and coaches in the basketball community. Did three games Saturday and after two of the games had both parents and coaches shake hands with me and my partner and say that they appreciated the job we did and hoped to see us at a future game. (It's a youth league grade 4-8 and we can't really avoid parents and coaches as there is usually no place to go).

Caveat: whenever we'd receive a compliment like that a partner of mine would always remind us "If you believe them when they say you're good you got to believe them when they say you're bad."

Exactly, which is why I always smile and say thank you but file it in my banks as a sportsmanship display rather than a true critique of my officiating.

I don't take parental comments as a critique of my officiating, I'm probably my toughest critic as I think about situations on the way home and then spend a half hour that same evening with a glass of single malt and the book and review whatever I feel unsure or deficient about. This board has an impressive database of issues and suggestions as well. And, a fair amount of humor. For that matter I worked with the league assignor the other day and I was being tougher on myself than he thought I should have been. He was actually very complimentary.

My point is that there are some parents and coaches illustrating behavior that's more appropriate than the alternative we so often see.

Agreed
 

And I also take note whether they're from the winning....or losing team.

For me, a thank you or any positive comments from a losing coach/parent/player means just a little bit more.... and is possibly more genuine.

I was doing a 7th/8th grade CYO game the other day, and late in a close game, I saw A1 shove B1 during a dead ball. I had done team A several times over the last couple of years, and knew the coaches were very good about sportsmanship and such, so it was a little surprising.

Anyway, I called the T on A1, and the coaches sat him down immediately, and A ended up losing by 4 or 5 points.

Between games, the A coach came over to thank us for working the game, the way he always does, and I asked him "OK, coach, what did I miss on that T? Did your guy get shoved first?" and he said "Yeah, the other player kind of gave him a little extra elbow, and then my guy pushed him back. But they have to learn that someone being unsporting is no excuse for them being unsporting - you guys did a great job, thanks!".

And I thought "I would do a lot more CYO games if more of the coaches had that guys attitude..." Sadly, that is not the case.

Not really a question of whether you "believe them" so much as it is a appreciated display of courtesy in a environment where it is often missing.

Well said.

So....both teams won? ;)

So, that would be like a VICTORY BLARGE?!?

I'm against that.

wobw

C'mon Snaqs, I think I got it, but it explain it before someone asks.......

Would Oracle Be Wrong?

Hmmm...
 

I had Worst of Both Worlds.

Or Waste of Band Width. ;)

You're picking on him.

guilty

But which "him"?

The one who won't get his feelings hurt.

Why, because he's too dumb?

You're picking on him.

I never said that.

Well, then I'm glad it's not me.

Hey, wait a minute...