I have finally had it and realize its not worth it anymore

[Adam]

I learned something from an official on this board with whom I've worked in the past. At that level, take nothing. They all (players and coaches) need to learn the game still, and giving the refs a hard time will not help them with that. If they have a question, answer, but it better be done respectfully.

No one's job or scholarship is on the line, so they can't use the excuse of too much pressure.

[CoachCER]

As a league director with ages K-8 in my program, my BS-o-meter automatically goes off at the start of the letter, and just gets worse from there.

I don't have an issue with hiring officials and keeping score at that age, although we prefer to train and use the high school players from our varsity program, but I do agree that some parents just take it too far. Unfortunately, many well-intentioned parent/coaches are driven off for similar reasons.

[Adam]

By the way, JPac, just remember, no one who matters thinks anything about that letter. It comes with the territory. I've had an AAU mom come up and ask for my name after the game so she could report me "to AAU."

I told her she could talk to the tournament director, but we did not give her our names. Not out of fear that she'd report us to AAU, just out of principal.

I've had a coach come into the locker room and ask for my name after a rec league game. I was too new, so I gave it to him; nothing came of it. Assigners are used to this crap.

[chartrusepengui]

Originally Posted by Snaqwells

By the way, JPac, just remember, no one who matters thinks anything about that letter. It comes with the territory. I've had an AAU mom come up and ask for my name after the game so she could report me "to AAU."

You should have asked for her name and address. When she asked why - you could have told her it was to report her to child services for putting toooo much pressure and stress on her child.

[26 Year Gap]

Originally Posted by representing View Post
My 2 cents: There needs to be some sort of biddy league organization, whether by the state or nationally, that will dictate the biddy rules for all biddy leagues so there are no confusions for officials and coaches who officiate/coach several different leagues in an area.


I don't think the coach was some old lady, but I will go back an re-read the OP.

[rockyroad]

JPaco, if it really bothering you this much (and I can see why it it just on principle) then contact the league administrator and ask that he contact the coach and demand that the coach provide video evidence of this "travesty". It may be an early age for the players, but it's a great time to teach the parents/coaches that there are consequences to taking pot shots at officials...

If the guy can't provide video evidence of you "cheating", then the league admin. should tell him to take a hike. If he does provide some parent's video, then the league admin should make the coach sit down with them and watch it. At the first DD called on the other team, stop the video and tell them to go home and not make accusations like that again.

Will any of that happen? Probably not...but it can't hurt to make the request.

[Adam]

Originally Posted by rockyroad

JPaco, if it really bothering you this much (and I can see why it it just on principle) then contact the league administrator and ask that he contact the coach and demand that the coach provide video evidence of this "travesty". It may be an early age for the players, but it's a great time to teach the parents/coaches that there are consequences to taking pot shots at officials...

If the guy can't provide video evidence of you "cheating", then the league admin. should tell him to take a hike. If he does provide some parent's video, then the league admin should make the coach sit down with them and watch it. At the first DD called on the other team, stop the video and tell them to go home and not make accusations like that again.

Will any of that happen? Probably not...but it can't hurt to make the request.

+1

And then tell the director you want to work the rest of this team's games this season. rocky's right, the coach needs to know how serious these accusations are.

And if you do work their games, don't say a word about any of this.

Again, it might just be me, but I'd clear my schedule just to see the look on the parents' faces.

[Judtech]

I had the same thoughts as ROCKY. You KNOW that there was more than one parent with the omnipresent video camera making sure to get their youngin on cam. I can be a tad more confrontational in these situations, and would ask the assignor of the league to set up a meeting with the coach so the three ofyou could discuss the situation. Oh wait, he wasnt there? Then forget it!
I am thinking this is an Upward Bound league. Our church has one as well, and I was asked to speak to the parents, officials, et al prior to the season (Season 2). As a former player, current official, and current coach, I addressed the need to SUPPORT everyone. NO ONE is out to "get" your child. Coaches should not try to be John Calipari. At the end of the league, if the kids can dribble (with both hands) understand a little of the rules, learn how to make a lay up with/without someone guarding them, and most importantly HAVE FUN, then they had a successful year!!
Ok, so I actually ran one of these type leagues before and that was OUR motto. I used to "quiz" the kids. Let's say a kid picks up their dribble runs a few steps and dribbles again, I would blow my whistle, have the kid come over and ask if they knew what they did wrong. If they didnt know I would tell them, make the "promise" not to do it again, blow the whistle and off we went!! Everyone had fun!!

[Mark Padgett]

Originally Posted by chartrusepengui

You should have asked for her name and address. When she asked why - you could have told her it was to report her to child services for putting toooo much pressure and stress on her child.

This is a great idea. I'm filing it away in my spacious brain. BTW - a few years ago, I had some clown ask me for my name after a game. I told him it was "Pat McCrotch". He actually wrote it down.

[representing]

Originally Posted by Mark Padgett

This is a great idea. I'm filing it away in my spacious brain. BTW - a few years ago, I had some clown ask me for my name after a game. I told him it was "Pat McCrotch". He actually wrote it down.

+5

haha that is too funny!

[grunewar]

Originally Posted by Judtech

I am thinking this is an Upward Bound league. Our church has one as well, and I was asked to speak to the parents, officials, et al prior to the season (Season 2). As a former player, current official, and current coach, I addressed the need to SUPPORT everyone. NO ONE is out to "get" your child. Coaches should not try to be John Calipari. At the end of the league, if the kids can dribble (with both hands) understand a little of the rules, learn how to make a lay up with/without someone guarding them, and most importantly HAVE FUN, then they had a successful year!!

Ok, so I actually ran one of these type leagues before and that was OUR motto.

I've been involved with several Wreck Leagues that talk the talk......even sign memos saying they'll be "good parents."

It's all beautiful until you toss the first ball to start the year......then, some parents/coaches just lose their minds!

[just another ref]

When criticized at this level, three words come to mind.

Consider the source.

[JPaco54]

Appreciate the feedback and will take it under advisement, especially passing on this age group next time. I have calmed down a bit now but, I did make a recommendation to have the coaches ref their own games at this level and they would avoid the fee and issues with the ref. That would be fun to watch a coach call DD on his own player. I may take it one more step to help the League Director understand the seriousness of the accusation though. The more I think about it the more I realize I have probably spent way too much time on this issue and need to move on. I love the game and like most of you, take pride in what we do. For spite though I like some of your suggestions of doing more of their games, but it comes back to the point of my character and do I really want to be like that. I don't think so! I believe the humorous comments helped me chill some and look at this on the lighter side. Now as my old coach would say - "To God be the Glory! Amen! Now let’s go play some ball!"

[ILRef80]

Sheesh. Hang in there. It's really sad when adults do things like this.

Just stop working that level of ball. Although, if I already had a game scheduled, I'd still work that game. Don't allow a guy who wasn't even there to bully you if you still want to work the league.

Also, the coach needs to learn the difference between "could care less" and "couldn't care less".

[Mark Padgett]

Originally Posted by representing

+5

haha that is too funny!

Wait - it's even funnier. He asked me to spell it.