I would, but not in those words.

Well, the game went really well.

Close game, great partner, and I really didn't have to deal with coaches unless to say "first horn blue"

There was only one time when a coach really questioned my call, but I'm sure it was the right one, and the evaluator who was there to watch me seemed to agree.

Towards the end of the game, when the score was no longer in doubt, the coach of the team in the lead started chirping a bit, but nothing out of hand that I needed to address.

Too bad they can't all be like this.

Try to keep both coaches happy. Watch the foul count and make "extra" *wink, wink* calls if you have to in order to keep it even as possible. If a fan says anything to you, give him the one eye wild look, sneer menacingly and growl. If a coach irritates you, tell HIM, "Shut the hell up and sit yer @SS down little girl before I gotta put you down mudda fukah." Make sure to hit concessions during half time, or break between double header and announce, "I'm here for my free referee hot dog, do you warm your buns?" Then ask for a cup of coffee and tell them, "leave enough room in the cup for my booze." Wear a sweatshirt under your ref jacket emblazoned with the macot name or school name of one of the teams and make sure it's noticed. Doesn't matter which side. In pre game, spend all of your time talking to one coaching staff, while ignoring the other, crack innapropriate ethnic jokes. Say out loud at the scorers table, "I accidentally brought me reading glasses, so this might not go well." Whenever a player hits the deck, jump in the air, land in a wide squat with arms spread wide and yell, "Safe!" When you're the trail, see how many possessions in a row you can not make it across half court. If a Coach tries to confront you, break into your best Bobby Diniro, "You talking to me, you talking to me, you talking to me punk?" Pay a street person, or otherwise needy person to come into the game and loudly heckle you from half way up the stands, then the first time a coach makes a peep directed at you, call an officials time out, leap into the stands and punch out the heckler. Then go back to the coach and say, "Sorry, you were saying?"

Good luck, btw- if you were any one of the 6 referees working our two game scrimmage tonight, you did a good job. We had nobody at the scorers table because it was a running clock and no score board, so the 3 refs not in the game at the moment were sitting at the table. At one point, one of the guys (referee) hollers, "C'mon Ref, you're killing me!" I looked over and he had a big grin on his face. I'm still laughing about that one.

Yes, I concur......I would not bring this up either. General rule is to be approachable, answer questions, not statements.

Extend your arm with your hand open (the "stop" sign) to visually show everyone in the gym that a warning has been issued.

I say, "Coach, that's enough." I don't say it's a warning.

Then, follow through with a "T" when the coach starts again on you.

Example: I had a coach who would not let an issue drop. I was going to administer a throw-in near her spot on the bench and as I was approaching the spot, she kept it up. I gave her the "stop" sign and said, "Coach, that's enough." As soon as the ball was inbounded, she started in again. WHACK!

I never heard a word from her the rest of the game. In my eyes, I was doing her a favor but making her stop officiating and having her goe back to coaching her team. Coaches really short-change their team when they get out of control and stop coaching.

I was a coach and I know what it's like on both sides of the whistle. In truth, I appreciated officials who put me in my place when I got emotional.