Knowing when to stop
 

They just don't seem to know when to leave well-enough alone, do they? :D

GV game Monday night. Very early in 3rd quarter, I am lead and have a blocking foul on H team. She was positioned to take the charge, but the shooter pulled up right in front of her and she leaned in for the contact. Easy call for me, but Home HC not terribly impressed. From his bench at the far end, he thought all contact was by the shooter.

About 3 min. later a similar play develops with my P as the lead, I am opposite the table looking through the lane....I see some of the contact, but the play is right in front of him and I'm sure not going to question his call. We switch and I administer the FTs, then we head back down the court with me as the new trail. Of course, I'm standing in front of the H bench when the ball goes out of bounds on the baseline. With a dead ball and subs coming in, the H AC very politely asks what his girls are doing to get blocking calls instead of charge calls. I explain what I had on my call and say he will have to check with my P on the second call, it was squarely in front of him.

AC was not at all rude and P is now ready to put ball in play, so I take a step away from the bench and onto the court. Now HC starts to chirp:

Home HC: Are you kidding me with the "she leaned forward and caused the contact" bit?
Me: (silence...it can't be quoted, right?)
Home HC: Have you ever taken a charge in your life?
Me: That's enough, Coach. (still watching the players)
Home HC: That's what I thought, you don't have the first clue what you're doing out there...

My whistle sounded at this point for the unsportsman T. Suddenly he was quiet (and seated) the rest of the night. His AC was polite and received a polite answer in return...why in the world would he push the issue?

coaches and referees
 

Women are from venus and Men are from Mars just like coaches and referees.

Don't ever try to understand why they say what they say. Just try to ignore them for as long as you possibly can.

If you know the coach and have a relationship with him, tell him "coach this conversation has gone down hill far enough." Then tell the AC in a polite manner to take care of things. They normally will.

They don't understand us and we don't understand them.

Mizzou,

I swear we had the same game. Someone is teaching the girls the same thing..and the coaches the same response. I told the HC (I never let an assistant coach question a call...no matter how polite) that his player leaned in and bumped the dribbler off balance -- no matter how well she had set her feet to "take the charge."

He mumbled some words about my not understanding coaching high school girls, but I was already moving to administer the throw-in, so the discussion ended abruptly.

I understand what you're saying here, BayState and I agree...but the question wasn't "How could you make that call?" but more "What are the girls doing to draw a blocking call instead of a charge?" During a dead ball, I'll generally answer a question from any coach or player who is respectful if I'm standing right next to them.

During a live ball, I don't want to hear anyone from the bench area except the HC....and then only rarely! :D

Assitant coaches in many cases will be Head Coaches at some point. If they ask a legitimate question in a respectful manner during dead ball sitch's then I will respond in kind. We have an opportunity here to show mutual respect and possibly build a foundation for the future when they are a head coach. If you ignore them or treat them poorly you burn that bridge early imo.
Additionally, sometimes you can use the AC to help reign in a HC if you have not crapped on him unnecessarily which can help keep a game from spiraling down the toilet.

I don't understand why anyone would not respond as SWMO did. To me it is common sense/ common courtesy. Maybe he will help coach the players to correct their action if he knows what they are doing wrong which will also help to improve/ clean up the game.

Now if the AC is complaining/whining/griping etc that gets shut down IMMEDIATELY.