Why the Kings lost

[Mark Padgett]

Here's the top three reasons the Kings lost game 7:

1) 53% free throw shooting
2) Adelman had Christie in the game even though he was 0 for June
3) their players didn't have enough vowels in their names

Here's the top three reasons game 7 will go down in history:

1) Shaq got called for 3 seconds offensively - twice!!!
2) Steve Jones and Bill Walton both admitted they were wrong!!! It was on whether or not a shot hit the rim and should have reset the shot clock.
3) Vlade Divac received a special Emmy for best imitation of a soccer player flopping in excruciating pain when not even touched by another player.

My prediction for the finals is the Lakers in 3. Yeah, I know it's best of 7, but the first 3 games will be such blowouts that David Stern will invoke a mercy rule and call it off.

In order to not lose their television revenue, they will show Celebrity Boxing featuring Vlade Divac vs. a boxing kangaroo. My money's on the kangaroo because the first time he throws a punch, Vlade will flop, even if it misses. The guy's on his back more than Heide Fleiss.