Sportsmanship speech

[Mark Padgett]

Originally Posted by chartrusepengui

Wow! Last night HC runs after me off court instead of shaking hands with opponent players/coaches because I am the worst official he's ever seen. (

When a coach tells you that, reply "that's impossible, the odds against having the worst official and the worst coach working the same game are too great."

[Raymond]

Originally Posted by Mark Padgett

When a coach tells you that, reply "that's impossible, the odds against having the worst official and the worst coach working the same game are too great."

Or just tell him "my profiency in officiating is usually comensurate to the level of coaching."

That'll leave him baffled for a few minutes as you walk away.

[derwil]

I'll motion towards my partner and say "no coach, HE's the worst official in the world. I came in second place again".

[Rich]

"Aww, coach, and to think you're my second favorite coach in the world."

"Second favorite?"

"Everyone else is tied for first."

[Rufus]

This announcement kind of cracks me up too. I did two JV games and hung around for the V games afterward. Not 2 minutes after the speech, the local edition of the Cameron crazies were chanting "Take his whistle" and "I'm blind, I'm deaf, I wanna be a ref!" The AD and principal were cracking up at their obviously witty and inventive student body.

On the plus side my kids really got a kick out of the "I'm blind" one.

[Rich]

"Nuts and bolts, nuts and bolts, we got screwed."

"Elevator, elevator, we got the shaft."

I have some partners that are bothered by these things and I have to fight not to laugh, myself. When I was in high school, I was one of the kids chanting, so I remember, even though it's not exactly recent history.

[Ignats75]

My personal favorite:

"Its Hard to Blow the Whistle when you $uk."