to show the consistent whiners what verticality looks like, and what they look like when they go up (out-of-control-&-determined-to-draw-a-foul) against a vertical defender.
and for the little-kid games, I'm going to start carrying a picture with me -- ten ducks on a pond going after the same piece of bread crust. I'll show it to the coaches when they complain that their kids are getting hit while rebounding in the paint.