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-   -   "Stare at me all you want to..." (https://forum.officiating.com/basketball/3834-stare-me-all-you-want.html)

rainmaker Tue Jan 22, 2002 12:12pm

I thought of Mark Dexter on Friday night at a girls JV game I did. Coach B (see thread "Coaching Issues") was mad that his team was behind, and decided it was our fault. midway through the second quarter, he said to me, "You're calling a lot more fouls on us than them. Do you like them better?" This after we had just called two in a row on A, and A had 10 fouls, and B only five. I said, "Coach we call what we see." He said, "I think you've got a formula, three for us one for them." While his girl is missing two free throws. I put up my hand, and said, "That's enough." He \said, "Well, you just called one for them so now we get three more." WHACK!! I thought, "Well, perhaps, coach you were right, and here's the first of those three." I didn't say that!

About two plays later Coach B gets a time out. He walks out about to where the person who reported the time out would stand if it was a 30 second time out. and just stands there and stares at me. For almost the whole time out. There was no assistant coach. The poor girls were just huddled in the bench area with nothing to think about or do. I stood at the endline where I was going to inbound the ball, and tried not to laugh. And thought about Mark Dexter's signature line, "You can stare at me all you want, I'm not going to change my call."

Later I told my partner, "I'm not going to eject him, I don't want to do the paper work."

Bart Tyson Tue Jan 22, 2002 12:30pm

If you have already given him a T. I might cut a little slack on his stare down. If not, my rope might be a little shorter. Stare down is taunting.

crew Tue Jan 22, 2002 12:35pm

rain,
on your situation- if the coach were to burn a timeout to stare at me(i consider this showing up an official) i would approach him and say, "you need to get to your bench." if he does not go to his bench within a coupl of sec. i would then give him his second tech and be done with it.

i have a friend that had this similar situation. he went to the coach and asked "do you want a tech?" the coach said, "do it." he then administered the second and the coach went away.

coaches do this and win when the official does not address the situation. you lose credibility in the coaches eyes and make it difficult on yourself in future games with him because he will not have as much respect for you.

i am not saying what you did was wrong(you may have done the best thing for the situation) but this is how i read your situation. he questioning you guys quite a bit it seems.

stripes Tue Jan 22, 2002 12:50pm

I wouldn't let the stare down continue. I would tell the coach to go back and coach. If he chooses to continue staring, I'd whack him and be done with it.

Don't let the coach show you up. Ever.

Dan_ref Tue Jan 22, 2002 12:57pm

FWIW I agree with crew & stripes. He was staring at you,
you should have acted on it.

Bart Tyson Tue Jan 22, 2002 01:07pm

JV game, no asst., one T already, hmmmm. i guess i would have to be in that position to decide what to do. I would have to take the whole game in consideration. i.e. time & distance, attitudes of coaches and players, etc. I might want to even take in consideration of my performace. If i just called a Horse xxxx call.

Mark Padgett Tue Jan 22, 2002 03:07pm

Juulie - give him the "3-finger salute" while rubbing your nose. Then stare at his pants and puke on his shoes.

Seriously (really, I'll try) - I would have told him that while he could come out a little on the court during a timeout, he needs to stay in the bench area. You could try this:

"Coach, apparently you don't think you can be of any benefit to you team during this timeout, but you still must stay near your bench area and not out here in the middle of the floor. Do I make myself clear?"

Then, if he immediately doesn't turn around and go back - WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!

Game over - problem solved.

BTW - just keep repeating this mantra - "Paperwork is fun."

rainmaker Tue Jan 22, 2002 05:32pm

Hmmm.....

Interesting responses, and not what I expected. I didn't feel shown up, I felt that he was showing how pathetic his coaching was. I mean, fans were laughing and commenting. The whole thing was really so childish. But I see your point about respect from then on. I wonder if this (staring) incident contributed to the lack of respect shown by the other coach later in the game? (See post, "Coaching Issues")

Mark Dexter Tue Jan 22, 2002 07:32pm

Wait. This coach's team had 5 fouls, the other team had 10 fouls, and he was complaining that you were throwing the game to the other team?

I have an ejection for participating without a brain.

paulis Tue Jan 22, 2002 09:31pm

"Coach, if I have to stay here to watch this mess, then so do you."

Mark Dexter Tue Jan 22, 2002 10:02pm

Quote:

Originally posted by paulis
"Coach, if I have to stay here to watch this mess, then so do you."
I love this one.

I should use it when we get close to the 30-point forfeit rule.

Doug Tue Jan 22, 2002 10:04pm

I used that expression once, and it got me in lots of trouble, got the coach even more worked up. "well, it is your fault that this is a mess, do something about it, don't swallow your whistle every time you get to MY side of the court!" So, I don't use that one anymore, I am going to try Mark's "coach, that's a coaching issue though"

Dan_ref Tue Jan 22, 2002 10:21pm

Quote:

Originally posted by rainmaker
Hmmm.....

Interesting responses, and not what I expected. I didn't feel shown up, I felt that he was showing how pathetic his coaching was. I mean, fans were laughing and commenting. The whole thing was really so childish. But I see your point about respect from then on. I wonder if this (staring) incident contributed to the lack of respect shown by the other coach later in the game? (See post, "Coaching Issues")

Maybe. BTW, it's been my experience that the ability to
"take care of business" is huge in separating the V refs
from for JV refs. FWIW.

Matt S. Tue Jan 22, 2002 11:24pm

Not to sound like a jerk but...
 
If you told your partner "you didn't want to do the paperwork" you need to reconsider why you're officiating that level of ball. I agree, that in a low-level, blowout game, you keep the coach and put up with his b.s. But in any high school game, you need to set the example, and not condone this kind of behavior.

My association just had one of the C.I.F. head-honchos come and talk to us about this exact problem. By not ejecting the coach, you're setting a precedent for every official that does his games the rest of the season. Stand up for yourself, eject the S.O.B., and take the 5 minutes it takes to fax in a report!

rainmaker Tue Jan 22, 2002 11:50pm

Quote:

Originally posted by Mark Dexter
Wait. This coach's team had 5 fouls, the other team had 10 fouls, and he was complaining that you were throwing the game to the other team?

I have an ejection for participating without a brain.

I told my partner at half-time, "I gave the technical for stupidity."



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