Juulie - on your original case, did your partner think the shooter actually violated according to rule, or did he think what the shooter did was a violation? Clarifying that point certainly is reason enough for a huddle and a correction if there was a wrong rule interpretation.

However, if it was just his judgement that there was an actual violation by rule, I would go with it and just tell him that from now, that's your call.

Of course, this would never happen in a game we were doing together. :)

Well, yes, holding a good pre-game is something I'm working on, since I never have had to do it at all until the last three weeks. But in this case, all my studying and pre-game outlines were unavailing, since this was the second of a two game set, and my partner was at McDonalds between games!!

Re: Jewels and equality.
 

In this case, I think he had other issues, although I didn't spend a lot of time psychoanalyzing him. He's a year ahead of me in the training structure of our assn, and I think he thought I needed help. He reached a lot, I was guessing because he felt he needed to control the game for me.

Actually, our association has done a very good job of establishing a culture of equality. I have very seldom felt condescended to or patronized. We have several female refs who are very, very good, and this helps. There are still some issues in the association, and of course, many male coaches are jerks, but that's no different for you guys, is it? It's just a different kind of jerk-ness, maybe.