Really I do. I am VERY open to suggestions, comments,feedback and for our religious members you are more than welcome to throw a prayer my way.

I am a 2nd year ref. I do the frosh/jv levels. So the opporturnity to work on this skill set is very available.

So lets start with the chronic complaining from the coaching box. I mean in and of itself one comment is not intrusive but midway through the 2 qtr they haven't shut up once. Should i stop and address it once in awhile or should i just accept this as part of the noise of the game ?

Example. BJV tourny game. 1 qtr. and the coach is like ballistic over routine calls/ no calls. I am calling more fouls this year but i also understand the need of playing through some stuff. So how do i handle a coach who has lost it over routine calls not going his way. I tried talking to him but he really just wanted to complain about EVERY call in his life that didn't go his way. By halftime he had settled down. The game finished pretty clean.

Last night championship of a pretty big GJV tourney. Coach, very politetly had something to say about every call that didn't go her way. her complaints were the games too rough (we called 34 fouls) in the 2nd half alone. i told her i agreed the game was too rough and they should clean it up and her reply was her lil darlings had nothing too do with it. Sigh. So lets start with those two examples. and see what you lords of the hardcourt come up with.

Thanks . i know for lots of you this is old news but for me it is all brand new.

Chess Ref,

Managing coaches is definitely an art and not a science and it does take most officials longer to learn that part of the game than the fouls and violations part.

Try a few things and see how they work for you. Here are four suggestions, but you'll probably find things that will work better for you. As I said, it's an art and not a science.

1) Notice what the coach is doing right off the bat. If he/she has been complaining for the entire first quarter and you didn't do anything to address it, you are already in a tough spot. If they start out complaining right from the get-go, find an opportunity to get over there by the bench at a dead ball and in a nice way say something like, "coach, I need you to coach and I need you to let us ref." Sometimes they get the picture.

2) If you make a call that they don't like and they are STILL complaining about the same call after a trip down and back say something like, "coach, that call is in the past. I disagree. We are moving on." If he/she still won't let it go, go ahead and give an early T. Unfortunately at the sub-varsity levels, many of those coaches haven't figured out the communication part of the game with officials yet either and an early whack is sometimes your best friend.

3) Start managing the coaches box right out of the gate. The first time they wander past the boundary, wave them back in or say, "please stay in the box coach" as you run past them. Sometimes they start watching their feet for the rest of the game which distracts them from whining so much.

4) Address it in the pregame with your partner(s). Managing coaches is a crew job and all of you should be working on it. "Protect your partner" is a good thing to talk about in your pregame routine. I give a quicker T for something said by a coach about a partner of mine than I do for something that is said directly to me by the coach. Teamwork.

I could go on, but those are just a few basic ideas. I'm sure some of the other vets will have some ideas that are better than those lame little tips I just gave.

Z

I am also a 2nd year official. I tried this technique at a lower level game and it actually worked.

Coach: "thats reaching"; "traveling"; "3 seconds"; "over the back" whatever, they may complain about.

Official: walks over coach, pick your spot

Coach: what do you mean?

Official: walks away leaving coach to ponder

I let coaches talk and complain if they want to. Many of them are not necessarily doing it to be a jerk. They THINK one of two things: either they are sticking up for their players by being as vocal as the players are agressive, AND/OR, they believe they have to work you to get the calls to go both ways. At the frosh/JV levels, you are dealing with mostly inexperienced HS coaches, but also coaches that watch their varsity coaches, college coaches on TV, and have the experience from playing, that they can also think going balistic every now and then is the right thing to do.

Take care of business on the court first. If a coach asks a question, you can address it if during a dead ball. If not, I ignore them, unless they commit an infraction of the rules -- then I penalize it. But I also give them the impression that I am listening to them and understand what they are saying. "OK, coach" or "yes, sir/maam" works wonders in many situations and its underused by lesser experienced officials who are still taking criticism a little too personally.

I've been out of the game for a while and am getting back in this year. I've found that because I'm older, there's less of a confrontational tone by coaches. You may be younger in age, and in the process, be getting dealt with differently than the same coach would deal with me. Fair or not, I had to go through that as well, so just learn from it. But do your best not to engage coaches who aren't getting out of control. If they are getting out of control, by all means deal with it, but don't look for situations.

Finally, there are some coaches that just have a chip on their shoulder when it comes to officials. Do your stuff as best you can with them and don't worry about it. Usually, these are the 50+ year old JV coaches who aren't going anywhere or have been somewhere, failed, and blame us for their failures. You aren't going to win any battles with them, so don't try. Work hard, enforce the bench rules, keep the game under control, and I promise you that in the vast majority of situations, other things will take care of themselves.

You have to fit advice that fits your personality.

A cute/funny line that one official can get away with, won't work for another.

A stern warning or look may work for some, while another may get laughed at for doing it.

There is no blanket to throw over this one.

My advice:

The box, first time by, "Coach where are you at?" Second time, if that does not fix it, "Coach I need you in your box."

If they are out blasting me or my partner, well, I won't be worrying about them being out of their box, because they won't have one after the T.

I don't feel the need to address statements, unless it is with a warning or a T. Questions in a respectful manner get answered, as briefly and professionally as possible.

The coach that is yapping, but not crossing the line, pretty much gets ignored, unless their actions trickle down to the players or they become a distraction.

At that point I simply give a visual stop sign and calmly say, "Coach I've heard enough."

Once that warning is given, you don't give another.

If one coach is a problem and you do nothing to correct it, you have given permission for the other coach to act up.

Set the standard of conduct, enforce it consistently and sternly. Be calm and professional, don't lower yourself to their level, and never say anything that does not need to be said.

Try different things now in these games, find tactics that fit your personality, don't be fake, don't BS, and always be polite and professional.

I have come to the conclusion that no matter what you do or say, coaches will be coaches. I approach games the same way no matter who the coaches are. Just this year alone I have had coaches that were very confrontational and coaches that I could not even tell were in the gym. To be honest with you I really did not do anything different with each coach. Some coaches are just going to have a bug up their behinds no matter what you say or do. Some coaches will listen to what you have to say, other coaches will act as if you shot their first born when you talk to them. The main thing I try to do is to be short and sweet and firm with my comments when I respond. Obviously if a coach asks a question in a really nice way, that is how your response it. If they ask you a question in a hard way, you need to let it be known that you are not there to just hear them *****. You never should have to threaten a coach, just take care of business. Either way this is not an exact science and you will find that one technique will work one night and that same technique will not work at all another time.

Deal with coaches within your personality and learn from every situation. That is all you can do. I have had games where I feel witty and smart and games like I had last night I can do nothing right. Welcome to the up and down life of a sports official.

Peace

IMO this guy needed a quick warning followed by a quick T. Maybe skip the warning. Going ballistic is BS. Take care of buisiness & shut him up. If he doesn't shut up get him out of the gym. This type of coach I can work with - if she's polite I'll talk to her the entire game. Never tell a coach the game is too rough. Tell him there's a lot of contact on both sides.

All coaches are different, how you handle them depends on how they are working you.

I think you should be yourself and handle it any way you would handle a situation off the court, diplomatically (sp?).

That was me being diplomatic, although it is how I feel. If you don't want to worry about how to "handle" a coach the best thing for you to do is get better. If you handle your business the right way, a deserving coach will stick out like a sore thumb and you can just T him/her up. I've been meaning to ask some of my buddies if they talk more of less at the higher level. So far this year, I seem to talk less because "it is what it is" and the coaches know it, so they don't say as much about it. When needed, I still let them vent in a way where they know I'm listening. Do not go through a game with a problem coach. Take care of the situation, however you choose, and press on. An assigner in the south always says to answer a coach and then show him/her your backside.

Chess Ref, you've been given some good advise already about speaking/responding to coaches. Here's another thought if you're consistantly getting it from them......they might not see your confidence. Maybe your whistle is soft, your mechanics are indecisive and you carry the fouls to the table almost like you question them yourself. Possibly I'm way way off here but it's something to consider.

Chess,

Personally, some nights I can take more comments from a coach than on other nights. My gauge is that when what they are saying begins to bother me, I put a stop to it. Don't miss a call on the other end of the court because of some comment he made to you continues to naw at you. Also, don't let someone else set this threshhold for you and it doesn't necessarily have to be the same every night. On those nights I simply say "Coach, I've had enough" - stop sign for him and my partners. Then, on the next comment, call your T just like any other foul call. Do not go home stewing that you wished you had taken care of business. Do it before it starts to grind at you. Your games, your calls will get a lot better.

Coaches are not stupid - they will begin to understand when you have reached your threshhold if you are consistent with the T after you have given your stop sign.

Try it.

Mulk

Boys Varsity Tournament this weekend... some teams pulled out right before so we had some JV teams playing...

and just fyi: a coach should not get warned more than once.... like an official I worked with this weekend
"a coach isn't going to get 3 warnings , 1 from each. if you warn him, let us know"

Wrong way to handle a vocal sub-varsity coach:
"This is a varsity game coach, you'r not going to get that call."


Here's what I did with a similar coach.. let him talk. let him count 3 seconds... let him call travel, just ignore him... if something warrants attention, give it ot him , listen more than you speak. you can't quote silence.. "yes sir, i'll be looking" I'm not gunna lie - pop his team with something he's companing about and he'll shut up. I don't do that practice but i've seen some officails do it. But when he starts asking why he can't get a call, just ask him "coach, what exactly are you asking me?"

and if he crosses the line or won't let something go?
"Coach thats enough, this is your warning"

make it as stern as you need to.

I learned this a little too late in my early years - wait to whack a coach... make sure he gets loud enough or stupid enough so that when you do T him everyone and there momma in the gym knows why. If your partner is having a hard time with a caoch and your waiting to inbound - hit the whistle real quick to get your partners attention that your gunna put the ball in so that you can get the coach off his ***...

One of the things I tell our young referees is not to warn a coach that you will be giving him/her a Technical, cause once you do you are committed, and if you do not give that technical, your credibility is gone and they will keep on riding you. Be consistent. For all your games set your standards. Draw an imaginary line on the floor, and when they cross that line, surprise them!!

Wouldn't that be better advice to just tell them to make that line known with a warning and then back it up?

Technicals flying out of no where, this is a perceived place, looks worse than a clear cut stop sign that everyone sees getting run by the coach.

I consider the technical foul to be just another call, like a travel call or a team control foul, etc. therefore my statement. We all believe in how we are to handle situations and we all do differently, and have philosopies on how we are to referee the game which is why we all love the game. This is how I teach my philosopies. We will all have something to say that will help the young ones and my advise to my trainees is listen, take it all in and use the best that will suit their personality as we are all individuals and handle certain situations in different ways.

3 seconds is just another call, but do you tell a player to get out, or do you just surprise them?

Hands?

Post players banging?

Telling a coach you have heard enough is just preventive officiating. If a T is just another call, then why not work to prevent it, like we do other calls?;)

There comes a time when all efforts to quieten a coach down when he/she is out of control does not work. What kind of preventive officiating do you do then? Not all games are and will be the same.

This is a topic that hits close to me as a relatively newer official young in age. I had trouble early in my career properly dealing with coaches, particularly JV level coaches, and called a lot of Ts. Clearly, I feel that my biggest weakness as an official has been in dealing with those types of situations. I tried a number of methods, from explaining to being smart or trying to be funny, which may work for some, but not for me. After observing officials, primarily higher up than me and especially at camps, I've developed a theory which has worked very well for me so far. I have recently had much better dealings with coaches (although some of that may be due to the fact I'm no longer dealing with JV coaches...). My theory has several principles:

1) Call the obvious and referee your primary. If you're getting the obvious calls in front of you and you're not calling "game interrupters" away from the ball that aren't obvious and don't have an affect on the play, coaches will buy what you're selling a lot more so than if you're calling a whole bunch of ticky-tack, especially if you happen to miss an obvious foul. Calling the obvious makes you appear competent as an official and builds credibility.

2) Be in position, consider "believability" factor when you make a call, a couple steps can really help to sell a call.

3) Court demeanor: I know as a young official I went out there attempting to call a perfect game and was described as a very intense official. I think the intensity hurt me with the coaches, particularly if I "oversold" a call that went against them, it would annoy me. Comments also would get to me on a more personal level than I would've liked to admit. I think a good adage here is that in order to control the game, you first must fully control yourself, visibly demonstrate that control and appear relaxed rather than intense. An intense posture from me, I believe, made me appear unapproachable, and led to coaches taking potshots rather than dealing in a personal manner. Having too much of a presence, especially for a new official can be just as detrimental as appearing aloof or indecisive.

As a young official, you will definitely get challenged by coaches. I find it best to just adopt my style of dealing with coaches to my personality. So far I have found success in my approach, but I would love to hear some other advice/opinions because I still would love to improve my communication skills on the court.

If your a young official, and you look young, like I do, then yeah... just go ahead and prepare yourself, your gunna catch more crap, your under more scrutitny. I liked that suggestion about "just call the obvious" you don't want to do anything extra that will stand out to these coaches. you already do stand out becauseyou look younger, because your younger they're going to expect you to be in a little better shape and be hustling the entire time. You're goal should be that when you walk off the floor at the end of the night the stands/coaches are talking about more than just the referees.

Keep your nose clean


Edit:
I just wanted to say that warning a coach DOES not commit you to a techincal, but it does make him aware that hey "I might have one coming!"
If you warn a coach don't say "Keep it up and I'll T you up!"

"Coach, thats enough!" with a stop sign usually does the trick.

Only once have I said "Coach this is your warning, you keep this up and we'll be forced to deal with it accordingly!"

And then he finally got the picture.


[Edited by ace on Dec 5th, 2005 at 09:26 AM]

I'm suprised no one has brought up your pregame meeting. In my pregame I tell the coaches and players that we will be happy to answer QUESTIONS, (emphasis on questions) but if you're complaining and making a scene, you will force us to deal with you. Also, I agree with others, it sounds like you're putting up with too much crap. First time a coach complains loudly, give him a nice, firm stop sign and a "coach, that's enough". Next time you hear a complaint, deal with it using the whistle. When a coach goes ballistic, jumping up and complaining, take care of it with your whistle immediately. The more you let them complain, the more you're going to have to put up with.

I see it this way, and it is subject to interpretation depending on the coach/situation: (1) chatter; (2) venting; (3) getting on my case; (4) stop sign; (5) T.

If you buy into the fact that coaches want to do 1 & 2, you can then set your limits. I was a coach for many years and I knew that 1 & 2 had to happen for me. I also respected the officials that addressed the situation when I got to 3 & 4. Those officials did me a favor in that I returned to my coaching duties.

I used the stop sign in a game on Saturday and the coach got the message. I like the stop sign (along with "that's enough coach") because it is visual and everyone knows that the coach has been warned. And, I REALLY do follow it up with a T. I'd say that in 30-40 games last year that I gave out probably 2 T's. The stop sign works for me.

Correct answer, Junker. Expect JV and Freshman games to have inexperienced coaches who don't know their limits, and straighten them out before they get started.

Handling coaches has been one of my weakest areas, but I"m getting better. Here are some things that have worked for me.

1. Let the coach know you hear her. It's hard to believe, but a simple "I hear you caoch" can make a big difference.

2. Give a reasonable answer to a reasonable question.

3. Don't "threaten" a coach. "If you do that one more time..." "Not one more word..." are both absolutely not manageable.

4. I've developed a sort of a-b-c-d process in my own mind.
a. I hear you
b. Coach, I"m watching it
c. I've heard enough
d. whack!!

5. Don't argue. If the coach is mis-quoting a rule, you can say, "No the rule is legal guarding position." or "she pushed from behind which is illegal." If the coach contradicts that, you can sometimes say, "Coach, hand-checking is rule 10-6." or "Read the travelling section of Rule 4." You might also say, "I'll watch next time."

6. Sometimes unexpectedly agreeing with a coach helps a lot. "Ref, she was moving!!" "Yes, coach, she was." He's baffled because you've said he was right, yet you're not giving him what he wants. If he doesn't get the message in the bigger picture, move on to point b above.

7. Never lose your temper. This is where I fall down. Once you're angry, you've lost control. If you start to feel this, take a second to talk yourself through it.

8. Don't use sassy comebacks unless you're absolutely sure you can get away with it. If in doubt, err on the side of don't.

9. Try to stay pro-active.
A good pre-game conference with the coaches helps.
Try to talk them down. "Coach, please remember the box." "We're gonna call that one all night long."
If that doesn't work, warn well before you lose your temper. "Coach I've heard enough."
Do a great job.

10. admit it you're wrong. If you really blew it, say so.

11. Sometimes, you can "win" by "losing". I do this in this way. If the coach wants to argue about a rule, and I"m sure I'm right, I say, "Coach, I have my weaknesses as a ref, but rules are my greatest strength." He's still thinking about me admitting to weaknesses while I'm going on with the game.

12. Keep learning. Each coach is a different person. Each one will need slightly different treatment. Learn to be flexible and to adjust to each one. That way you're also giving respect and dignity to the caoch, and that's always a good thing.

I am very aware that sometimes a T is going to have to happen, so there is no disagreement there.

What I do disagree with is saying, just because one coach is bound to get a T, we should just let ten more keep going until they get one too, without us doing anything to prevent it.

Handling coaches and calming situations makes officiating much easier, and I think encouraging new officials TO NOT develop those skills is doing them a huge disservice.

My advice.

Most coaches just want to be heard, when you ignore them and just let them yap then you will have a problem. I like to tell a coach I hear him or that I will look for it. He then knows your listening.

There are some coaches that will just constantly wine and these coaches you have to handle differently. I suggest that you do not threaten coaches. Avoid lines like "One more word and..." or "I'm going to T you up if..." You can get the exact same thing accomplished by saying "That's enough coach." If you have some distance stop sign him, don't stop sign him if you're standing rigth infront of him, keep your hand low too. You wouldnt be too happy if someone stuck a hand right in your face either.

Once you've told him you've had enough the next step is a technical foul. And once you T him up and he replies with "That's the best call you've made all day." then your partner should come in and send him packing.

Now if you don't put an end to it rgiht away then it will be too late in the 4th quarter to stop it. Stop it right away and set the tone immediately.

T em high and let em fly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
O-wait, different sport.

I just wanted to make post #1111 before I left work today.

Stop Sign
 

One problem I have with the stop sign, and I use it, is that it visibly commits you to an action, and coaches will, particularly to a younger official, test it, and some might view it as a challenge to their ego. Therefore I think officials should be judicious about using the stop sign especially because using it perhaps too early could paint you as standoffish. There were times when I used the stop sign when I should've just T ed the coach and others when I did it when the action didn't necessarily warrant a stern warning. Doing so basically puts the coach on an island or backs him/her into a corner and can cut the lines of communication, or it could make the official seem weak and make it look like there won't be a penalty. I still use the stop sign, but I don't necessarily think of it as part of a prescribed chain of actions for dealing with coaches, just a tool that can be used with the right coach in the right situation.

If you ask any assignor/supervisor, they will strongly encourage you to use the "stop sign" with coaches. The main reason is so when a coach gets T'd, calls the supervisor after the game to complain and the supervisor sees a tape of the game, the supervisor can say - "coach I can't tell what either of you are saying, but I can clearly see that he gave you the 'stop sign' and you didn't stop!?!"

As Rainmaker posted previously, the "stop sign" is an important tool to use with coaches. Although it is one step in the progression of conflict resolution, it let's the coach know that they've reached the "end of the line". If they quiting complaining for several minutes, then you've diffused the situation. Now you can work and talk with them if needed about other situations - within reason of course.

Re: Stop Sign
 

I very much agree. An experienced official can make much more judicious use of the stopsign. But as my tag line used to say: Good judgement comes from experience. Experience, well that comes from poor judgement :D

handling coachs
 

a goal of mine this season is to try and have better communicatios with the coachs...they too put in alot of effort to teach our kids...if I have a coach that has been complaining about calls,not all calls all the time, at half I go over and allow him my "ear" ... most of the time I have found that it is usally one thing that has their concern...if it is justified I tell him I will look at it during the 2nd half...but I also allow the other coach his say...if it turns into a complaining session i'm gone. My partners tell me that i'm opening myself up to potential problems and have run into a buzzsaw once. I dont do this often but most coachs will calmly let you know thier concern...our association has given this a priority to better communicate with the coachs which forces us to improve our people skills and make us better officals.

Re: handling coachs
 

Personally, doing something like that would not work for me, especially because it gives the impression that you're catering to a certain coach or that you're giving the squeeky wheel the grease and it might lead to further problems. What has worked for me is to ask the coach to be more specific in what he wants me to look for. If he says something like, "they're all over the dribbler" and I don't see it that way, I'll ask, "I'm not seeing it, what exactly are they doing?" Or ask who they want me to watch. Now I'm getting information that I can use, I can watch #34 for the handcheck on the inner hip or #22 bumping cutters, and I can quickly tell if the coach has a point. If he does I can help him, if not and he continues to complain, I can offer a more educated point of view on what exactly I'm seeing. At the very least he knows I'm working, and at best he's helping me do my job by pointing out something I'm missing. That approach has helped me depersonalize the criticism and maintain a better demeanor on the court, but I can't say how well the approach would work at every level, particularly lower levels where coaches don't have the same experience in dealing with officials.

Re: handling coachs
 

I agree wholeheartedly with your partners.

Bad move. You're gonna pay for it some time.

Dealing with coaches...
 

I've been at this for @ five years, and I've been told I do a pretty good job of dealing with coaches. My 'recipe for success', if you will:

1) Come in with a 'Have Fun' attitude. Not saying I come in clowning around, but that I enjoy being around basketball. This is a fun game, so let's keep it that way.

2) Solid pregame with partner(s) and coach/captains. Both of these meetings go a long way, because you can establish some form of communication with the coaches and show them that you aren't there to give them a hard time. One quick joke in the pregame can go a long way in the game in terms of approachability.

3) Hustle and flow. If I'm hustling to get to my spots, and the game is flowing smoothly, there is less time for coaches to complain because they need to coach their respective teams. If the game gets too physical, do what needs to be done to clean it up. The players determine the flow of the game, but they will adjust to the officials if the game is tight.

4) Don't be afraid to talk to the coaches. There was a philosophy that you shouldn't ever talk to coaches, but I am a former coach and I can understand the thought process of some coaches and what they are looking for in the game. Some coaches have NO thought process at all, so leave them alone.

5) Kill 'em with kindness. Be extra polite, stay as relaxed as possible, and address their concern, but don't give them more than 10-15 seconds. Anything more than that is asking for trouble. Visit the topic once, and only once. Only answer questions, not the complaining and whining.

6) Ignore 'em. Almost contradictory, but it's not. When they start to 'sideline ref': 3 Seconds!, traveling!, And one!!, that's a foul!, etc. Just ignore them like you ignore the fans. They are only looking for an advantage for their team, while my job is to manage the game.

7) Don't overexplain! This is the Golden Rule, to me. If you think you spent too much time discussing a situation, you did. Don't try and explain advantage/disadvantage, how you choose to call 3 seconds, why this play is a handcheck but that one isn't, because they won't understand. Their player #15 might have given 3 kids concussions, but s/he is just 'playing hard', but if opponent #23 is within 3 feet of their players, you hear "Get 'em off!"

I used to occasionally tell a coach something before they would ask. It was a bad habit that I have broken. A good tip is to not initiate conversations with a coach. Let them come to you. I agreed with the partners in a previous post. Don't go looking for trouble.

[b[One quick joke in the pregame can go a long way in the game in terms of approachability[/b]

Do you have a standard list of jokes that you use and have found to work? An officiating buddy likes to tell the girls in the pregame "if you dunk the ball don't hang on the rim." I tried that in my last game and it went over real well. The season following 9/11 I explained that I was not Osama Bin Laden so i was not the enemy. The next season changed from Osama to Sadaam Hussein. Those seemed to work too.

Had a partner last week as the captains " So you've all read the rules books cover to cover I'm sure - right?"

Good laugh ensued

There is a lot of valuable advice in this thread. Here are some observations, many of which reinforce previous observations:

1 - Handling coaches is *really* important to becoming an excellent official. The fact that this question was asked, and that so many are reading and contributing, is a good thing.

2 - As a general rule, varsity coaches are easier to deal with than Fresh/JV coaches. I say that as a way to encourage newer officials who are dealing with difficult sub-varsity coaches. Not only will you get better, but the people you deal with will often be less frustrating. There is hope! (By the way, varsity coaches also tend to know the rules much better than sub-varsity coaches. By "easier," I do NOT mean to suggest that you can snow varsity coaches. They expect and demand competence ... as they should.)

3 - I agree that your level of visible confidence and competence plays a role here. Each of us needs to continue to get better, and we need to exude professional competence and confidence. That makes dealing with coaches easier.

4 - Never think that you'll win a coach over through reason (during a game). I made this mistake early in my career. A coach questioned my call. I thought that by explaining fully my point of view, and by connecting my point of view with the text of the rules, a coach would be brought to the point of saying: "Ah, yes. You are a wise and good official. Now that I have had that explained to me, I can continue in this game with confidence in your expertise." It never happened. It never will. Provide a brief/sound bite explanation/comment/answer and then be gone.

5 - A technical foul is an important and valuable tool for dealing with coaches. As a young official, I rarely, rarely called a T. I was of the mindset that virtually nothing anyone said bothered me, so just ignore it. What I perceived as my tough skin was perceived by assignors, athletic directors and some coaches as weakness. I have converted to the view that a T is just like any other foul/infraction. I do not view a traveling violation as a personal affront -- I just call it when and if I see it. Why view the technical foul on the coach a different way? When and if I see behavior that crosses the line, I simply call it. That's my job. People now view me as a stronger, more assertive official. It is a "perception," as I simply see myself as a better and more consistent official.

6 - I wholeheartedly agree with others that we each have to find methods that are genuine to our distinct personality.

7 - Because people are so different, and none of us is perfect, the art of handling coaches is one for which all of us can and should be attempting to getter better.

Best wishes to all!