I know some of you may cringe at actually uttering the words above but I want to know how many of you will actually tell a coach/plaer that you kicked one .
Over the past year (My first as an official official) I have done roughly 300 games with the skill level ranging from mens league to 5th grade CYO to AAU to High School Varsity (Pre season Tourneys)and I have admitted 3 times to either a player or coach that I did in fact miss a call .
Is this something that I should never do ? Is it acceptable at some levels but not others . Does it give you more credibility ? Or less ?
From personal experience in all 3 instances the coach / player has come up to me after each of the games and said they they really appreciated the fact that I admitted I missed a call . The first was a 5th grade CYO coach the second was a High School Varsity Coach and then last night it was a mens league player who said that in all the years he has been playing (He played D1) that is the first time he ever had an official admit he missed a call . As soon as the plyer said that it immediately raised a red flag and I thought that maybe I shouldn't have admitted I kicked it.....
Your feedback is appreciated

Depends

Do you think the coach/player is one who will use this against you?
Was it a judgement call that could have went either way?
Could saying something like; "I'll work harder", be a better comment?
Is this coach/player complaining alot?

Sometimes with some people, humility goes a-long-ways.
Sometimes with some people, they see your humility as a weaknesss.
Only you can prevent forest fires!

There's nothing wrong with occasionally telling a coach you might have missed one. I would never say it more than once a night though. A couple of weeks ago I had a charge that I just didn't come strong with my mechanics so the coach was obviously all over me. As I was heading downcourt the other way I said, "coach, I didn't come strong with that call. It's the first time all season that's happened and it won't happen again. I'm 100% sure I got the call correct, I just for some reason froze a spit second as I called it." Coach was fine with that and didn't hear another word from him all night.

I've heard that it can be a good thing to say, but I still (6 years) haven't had the nerve. I did say once, though, "Theoretically, coach, a ref might be wrong now and then." It had the same effect, of calming the coach down. I'm working on my attitude this year, and have made great strides, but this is still up there on the horizon somewhere. Maybe I'll try it tonight.

Rainmaker ,
I have learned in my limited time that if you use a word that has more then 3 syllables it often confuses the coach and renders them speechless for the rest of the day .
Example :
Coach : That was a travel
Ref : Coach , you have to take into account the Principles of Verticality .
Coach :

I've admitted "missing one" to coaches, never to players.

Never make such an admission more than once in a game or to the same coach in a lifetime.

I have admitted that to a coach but it is very rare. I usually we say something like this. "If that is what happened coach, then we missed it. I just did not see it that way at the time." I said that to a coach earlier this year when my partner and I had a foul in a Thanksgiving Tournament and the coach thought we missed the call all together. The coach thought his player (defender) blocked the ball instead of grabbing the shooter's arm. It was a close call and I thought my partner and I had it right. But this was a 40 point blowout game and it was obvious this team was not going to win. So I made the statement to get the coach back to focusing on his team and what was actually happening in the game. It worked for the most part and we all moved on.

Peace

I think that there is a time and a place for admissions like this, but, as has already been said, such admissions should be few and far in between. I also agree with Chris that you need to know a little about your admission recipient to know whether or not it is a good idea.

Generally, I try to finesse the issue with comments like those Rut suggested ("if that's what happened, I guess I must have missed it"). When something is real clear, however, the honest/truthful answer always enhances credibility with those for whom our credibility matters.

Had one last night in a great freshman boys game. H is down by about 6 and really going all out for steals. We're at about half court, and I'm busting my butt to get a good angle, just as V11 gets in my view and I can't see the players around the ball. In the second it takes me to change my angle, we've got 3 players on the floor scrambling for the ball. V coach is screaming to "get 'em off" (he'd been saying that all night, though). This is one of those situations where I wouldn't have been uncomortable telling the coach that I may have missed it because of the angle; but I never had to.

I guess, my concern is that a coach would respond with, "If you knew you missed it, why didn't you correct it?" I like the qualified statements, such as "If that's what happened, I missed it," or "That's not what I saw."

When I work with Snaqwells, I often have to tell coaches that my partner missed one...two.....three...well, you get the point. Just kidding Adam.

I agree with Snaqwells......I usually say "If it happened the way you say it did, then I miised it."
There are rare occasions where I will admit to blowing a call, but as many have pointed out, it depends on the situation.

I think when you say, "If it happened that way...." you give yourself an out. Most of the time the complaining from the coach is about judgment call, not a rule application. Or even when they are debating a rule application, it is based on what you saw as compared to what they saw. I do not think you flat out admit a mistake unless you know for sure you screwed up. For example if you misapplied a rule and you at halftime look up the situation and find out you screwed the pooch on that play. Or if you know you allowed a sub to come in and you know it was the improper time, and then you realize the mistake was made, and then I have no problem with admitting that kind of mistake. But those types of mistakes are very rare. I just do not think you go around every play that a coach disagrees with you admitting you were wrong. We all make judgment calls we are not particularly happy with when we make them during a game. I know I can usually point to at least one call a game. Most of the time those calls are not up for debate by a coach. They do not even know I feel that way because the call is not a big deal.

Peace

I only do it under circumstances, and if there's something good to be gained from it. If the coach politely asks me a question, and I KNOW I kicked it, I'll admit it to him that I made a mistake. I think they realize human error is a part of the game. I've had good success of coaches saying "Well that's ok" or not going ballistic. I'm not so vain that I'm going to argue, just for the sake of arguing, when I KNOW I'm wrong.

Then again, I wouldn't do it more than once a year to the same coach.

if human error wasn't an issue, he'd have his team shoot from mid court and they'd all be perfect. since that doesn't happen, in fact they miss alot of 2 foot put backs, they have to accept our humility if it's offered. That said, i don't offer my neck on a plate unless i KNOW it's going to help and we're talking about that perfect senerio maybe once per few games.

As a coach I would never expect the ref to say he missed a call. I've only had the experience of a ref tell me he missed a call was a couple weeks ago in a post season 7th grade league where my daughter plays. It's a great league, no pressure, the kids improvise and play like it's a pick up game.
The only time I had a ref tell me he missed a call was when my daughter (um, bit of a brag here, can't help it...) was fouled on a left handed lay-up in traffic, after busting a 3 person trap and looking a lot like Lebron at the time. The refs ran by and told me that she missed it because she was fouled, but it happened so fast and they were watching her play, and sorry but she is so fun to watch.... They were so awed by her all I could do was smile. She's one of those tiny, spit fire point guards, infinitley coachable and all about the game; lives, breathes and sleeps it. She averages 25 points, 5 assists and 5 rebounds (but whose counting right?). The ref did call another foul shortly after where she went for a fast break layup and was shoved pretty hard in the air. She was flying head first to the concrete block wall when out of nowhere came a man in stripes and caught her, set her down and called the foul. He never said a word to me or her. My hero.

Call some, miss some. In my neck of the woods, rec ball grades 3-8, it all works out in the end.

Coach G.

I've heard of "working the ref," but this sounds like the obverse: Working the Coach. Maybe I should ask for lessons!

This is why I added the note that I have done this only 3 times in roughly 300 games . I have never gone out of my way to openly proclaim that I blew the call (I won't say that I will never do that either) .
In all 3 circumstances I have been approached about a particular call... 1 clean block called a foul because I anticipated the foul (I know ....I am learning to let the play develop) 1 no call when the player was fouled ....I just froze for some reason even though my brain registered the foul and I forget the other one but it may have been a non intentional call on a layup (Not quite sure) .
Each time the Coach/player has approached me during a break well after the play and asked me politely what I saw and instead of just making sommething up I simply said that I had missed that call or something to that effect .

From my experience, the coach/player has appreciated the honesty. I had one time where I was the new lead on a breakaway, and was in a bad position to see the swipe at the ball. I called the foul, and could see from the reaction of the player I probably blew it. Soon afterward, there was a timeout, and I checked with my partner. He told me from his angle, it looked like a clean block. So, as the players were coming out of the huddle, I said, "Hey, #23, come here a second. Do you know why you get 5 fouls a game? That's one per quarter for the ones you commit, and an extra for the one the ref misses." She smiled, gave me a wink, and said "Thanks!"

I think most players/coaches appreciate it if we're working hard and occasionally admit to an obvious blunder. We are human, right. (Well, at least most of us. ;) )That said, I also agree it is something that can only be used sparingly. You are there to provide control and leadership to some extent, and you don't want to undermine it by continually admitting mistakes. Plus, there is a time and place for it. Yelling across the floor, "Sorry coach, musta missed that one!" won't work.

I have to disagree with one of your points. Just because a player reacted a certain way does not mean you blew the call. Players react all the time when they obviously committed a foul. Sometimes they react because they feel it was not them that fouled and their teammate did the deed.

Peace

Oh, I do agree with that. I've seen WAY too much of the "but I didn't do it" look. But in certain situations you can tell a genuine reaction from a normal "whine". In this case, it was late in the game, we had no problems from any of the players or coaches, and this player had been in the whole game. I could tell something was different. Nothing was said or done during the ensuing free throws, so I checked with my partner during a timeout soon after. Obviously, I could've avoided the entire thing by being in better position to make the call. But, in this case, I knew something was wrong, and I wanted to get confirmation before admitting it to the player. Plus, in this case, I didn't REALLY admit it, but she understood what I was getting at.

I have told a coach that I have missed one. It happened this year. Player A travelled and I did not call it. I went down the floor and was C in front of the coach. I said coach "You are correct. I missed it." It made a huge difference. I don't think he had ever heard a ref say "you are correct".

He simply nodded and said thanks. The game went on without incident.

I believe that it is a good thing to do. Saying I am wrong doesn't concern me. But how often I have to say it might. If there are thing happening every game that I need to admit I missed then that it the problem not the actual saying of it.

I have heard a couple of brand name D-1 officials talk about this. They've said that if you're going to survive you've got to be able to tell coaches three things:

1. I missed it coach
2. I'm not sure, coach, but I think we got it right
3. We got it right, coach. Check the film.

I'm sure the real magic is in knowing when and how to say it.

I've had pretty good success with the occassional "If that's how it happened, then I missed it."