Originally Posted by UNIgiantslayers (Post 972636)

Coach was whining all night. Whatever, I can handle that. Gets animated about a couple, raising his voice. I'm not large and he played D1 as a lineman so he is known for trying to bully his way into calls. He's yelling about a foul at one point (screaming and carrying on). I say "coach, enough." He stops, but I know more is coming. His girl goes in out of control and I don't hit my whistle because defender had LGP and his girl went into her while she's backpedling. All of a sudden I hear his clipboard smack the floor HARD. I knew exactly what he did and whacked him. My partner at halftime said "Man, I was gonna hit him with the Boston Tea Party but before I could even get the breath to hit the whistle, you were already done with the T and telling him to put his seatbelt on." I'm normally slow to T them up, and try not to be a dick but that was a no brainer. Hope you guys have a good Friday night slate of games!

Originally Posted by UNIgiantslayers (Post 972823)

Yeah I don't have a huge problem whacking them. Some officials around here are REALLY reticent to issue a technical. I'm not sure why.

Originally Posted by Dad (Post 972825)

Don't have a huge problem? Sounds like you have zero problem no-look whackin' coaches.

Originally Posted by Dad (Post 972825)

Don't have a huge problem? Sounds like you have zero problem no-look whackin' coaches.

Originally Posted by SC Official (Post 972831)

I don't need to look at a coach to know what he said or did.

Originally Posted by UNIgiantslayers (Post 972636)

Coach was whining all night. Whatever, I can handle that. [After the second or third whiny comment, he gets told "I've heard enough of that, coach." I'm certainly not listening to it all game.] Gets animated about a couple, raising his voice. I'm not large and he played D1 as a lineman so he is known for trying to bully his way into calls. He's yelling about a foul at one point (screaming and carrying on). I say "coach, enough." [I whack him right here. His behavior is poor and unsporting.] He stops, but I know more is coming. His girl goes in out of control and I don't hit my whistle because defender had LGP and his girl went into her while she's backpedling. All of a sudden I hear his clipboard smack the floor HARD. I knew exactly what he did and whacked him. [Second T comes here and he leaves.] My partner at halftime said "Man, I was gonna hit him with the Boston Tea Party but before I could even get the breath to hit the whistle, you were already done with the T and telling him to put his seatbelt on." I'm normally slow to T them up, and try not to be a dick but that was a no brainer. Hope you guys have a good Friday night slate of games!

Originally Posted by UNIgiantslayers (Post 972835)

Thanks for the input, I'm here to learn. I have them again tomorrow night, so I'll keep the short leash thing for sure.

Originally Posted by Rich (Post 972837)

The game starts as any other -- fresh slate for them and for you.

But the advice above is good. Shut down the whining early, warn, and then whack if that's what's called for.

Originally Posted by UNIgiantslayers (Post 972636)

"...you were already done with the T and telling him to put his seatbelt on."

Originally Posted by UNIgiantslayers (Post 972828)

He was the only guy with a clipboard. A clipboard that falls out of the hands doesn't echo like that. That was a no-doubter. Should I have looked first? That's an honest question.

Originally Posted by Dad (Post 972962)

Nah, you handled it well when you finally decided to give him a T. Just found it funny how you worded it. I prefer how quickly you did it instead of waiting for a partner to wack him when it's right next to you.

Originally Posted by Nevadaref (Post 972833)

You waited way too long to handle this. Let me share with you how I would have dealt with this coach.
My comments are inserted below in red.


You are too slow to deal with the initial bad behavior and so it escalates throughout the game. You need to address the problem sooner and make it known that you will not tolerate it. Frequently, this prevents the blow-up.

Originally Posted by SD Referee (Post 973209)

I've had a lot of good things happen by simply having a pleasant man to man conversation..

Originally Posted by Dad (Post 973210)

Oh, do tell.

Originally Posted by SD Referee (Post 973211)

By good things, I mean I've never had to whack a coach and I've never really had any trouble with any coach. I let them vent a little when it's appropriate and we move on. They know how I operate and they have been good to me. I think it's because of how I have handled them from the start.

Originally Posted by Rich (Post 973213)

"I've never had to whack a coach"

Sound the alarm bells.

Originally Posted by ODog (Post 973219)

I think what everyone is saying, SD, is that if you have never whacked a coach, you: A.) likely haven't done too many games, or B.) are far too permissive in what behavior you allow to continue. Could be both, but it's definitely not neither.

I'm happy you feel your approach is working for you so far. I can only hope your assignors agree. Remember, you WILL be giving technicals to coaches as long as you continue in this avocation, regardless of how you approach them or how much "respect" or "rapport" you feel has been built up.

And if you're a year or two in, and still haven't given any, your schedule (or lack thereof) might reflect that.

Originally Posted by SD Referee (Post 973220)

Been officiating for 10 years and I am a state tourney official. I do about 50 to 60 nights per year on the high school level. I would say that I have done my fair share of games, have plenty of experience, and that the athletic directors like me since they continue to give me as many games as I can handle. We don't have assignors here. The individual schools handle it.

I do have a pretty thick skin, but I honestly believe my approach works.

I have no doubt that someday I will have to give a coach a "T", but so far not one. Now kids are another story..........

Originally Posted by Dad (Post 973227)

Does your state exist?

I know of an official in our association who's never given a coach a T. I cringe every time we're assigned together because the game is going to last 20-30 minutes longer than it needs to. :(

Originally Posted by SD Referee (Post 973220)

... and that the athletic directors like me since they continue to give me as many games as I can handle. We don't have assignors here. The individual schools handle it.

...

Originally Posted by SD Referee (Post 973264)

... I let them plead their cases when the time is right and the game isn't interrupted. Sounds like most of you guys can't say the same?

Originally Posted by UNIgiantslayers (Post 973266)

I wouldn't say I'm confrontational, and I think I allow (what sounds like) a longer leash than most. I will not put up with disrespect, constant whining, or coaches trying to bully me. I'll let them vent a few times a game, but they need to know where I draw my line and if they can't figure it out after I tell them once, the other team is shooting 2.

Originally Posted by BadNewsRef (Post 973270)

That may explain why you haven't T'd any coaches. ;)

Originally Posted by Rich (Post 973291)

Neither am I.

I don't throw them around like candy at a Halloween parade, but I have a clear line that results in free throws being shot if it's crossed. I'll talk to a coach all day if he's asking questions. I'll let a coach complain, too -- if it's just a quick comment here and there, I may or may not even acknowledge it.

But there are simply too many officials who *will not* pull the trigger on coaches who clearly cross the line and, to me, that just legitimizes the behavior. Most officials who say "I haven't called a technical in 20 years" don't do so because they are afraid of their schedules or just think it's easier to turn down the hearing aids and get through the game.

HS athletics are an extension of the classroom. Not calling a technical on a coach that deserves one teaches the wrong lesson, in my opinion.

Originally Posted by Rich (Post 973291)

Neither am I.

I don't throw them around like candy at a Halloween parade, but I have a clear line that results in free throws being shot if it's crossed. I'll talk to a coach all day if he's asking questions. I'll let a coach complain, too -- if it's just a quick comment here and there, I may or may not even acknowledge it.

But there are simply too many officials who *will not* pull the trigger on coaches who clearly cross the line and, to me, that just legitimizes the behavior. Most officials who say "I haven't called a technical in 20 years" don't do so because they are afraid of their schedules or just think it's easier to turn down the hearing aids and get through the game.

HS athletics are an extension of the classroom. Not calling a technical on a coach that deserves one teaches the wrong lesson, in my opinion.

Originally Posted by BlueDevilRef (Post 973302)

And sometimes you just flat miss what should have been a T bc you are so dumbfounded that someone actually said it and it takes a sec to process what was said and by that time, the opportunity has passed. I'm not saying to be trigger happy but in basketball, I have found you have to be more ready to penalize unsporting acts/behavior than in softball.


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