Parent Etiquette
 

My 14 yr old son will be calling his first game as an umpire this Sat. My wife and I have watched him play travel ball for years but now watching him umpire is new.

Any suggestions? Do we cheer for a good call? Where would you sit? Can I take pictures?

We have been fortunate that our local area has a significant number of quality umpires that they have been a positive influence as evidence by the fact that he wants to be one.

Keep up the good work guys as you never know who is paying attention.

You can sit whereever you want, but you will find that you will not want to sit next to the other parents. ;)

Take pictures, but don't draw attention to the fact that you are taking pictures of the umpire.

Being the parent of a Junior umpire, and having trained them for years, you're actually asking a really good question.

First, you have to be tough skinned. You're going to hear your son be criticised like never before. Fans not only won't like his calls, they'll question why he's even out there, when a call doesn't go their way. It's going to happen, trust me. Be ready for that. If you can't sit quietly by, you'll need to move somewhere else.

Yeah, I'd take a few pictures. But don't be real obvious about. I've got some great ones of my son when he was 11, that are treasures (he's 23 now).

If you're anywhere in the West, consider sending him to the Little League Baseball Junior Umpire Training Academy next June. $300 for a full week of training, where they live at the facility, can't be beat. Here's a link:

http://www.eteamz.com/llbwest/files/...ireAcademy.pdf

My son is 14 and has shown great interest in joining the officiating ranks. For a couple of years, in fact, he's been grabbing my new copies of Referee Magazine before I can!

I'll probably get him started in some Little League this coming summer.

I forgot about the parents complaining about the umpires because I have never done that.:rolleyes: Guess I will take up a position down the line away from the action(parents).

When I started reading your post I immediately hoped that Kyle would chime in. Kyle is a huge proponent of utilizing junior umpires in LL games, and has given you some great advice. My son umpires as well, and it can be difficult to listen to some of the more nasty comments made when he's working a game that I'm just there to watch. You have to consider the source and not take it personally. The pastor of their local church could be working the dish in a game that their kids are playing in, and he'd be instantly villified as soon as a call didn't go there way. It comes with the job. Make sure to tell your son that too.

Tim.

I'm almost at this stage with my son too. Just remember, you're not a cheering party anymore. There WILL be close plays - it's the nature of the game. And on all of those - every single one --- half of the stands will momentarily hate your son. If he's unfortunate enough to have several close ones go against one team in a row (and this WILL happen), that side's going to get loud. Fight the urge to defend him - you truly have no idea how these already angry people will react. Many just want to vent, but some want more. Your son has a fence between him and these idiots. You do not. Stay above it.

A couple more things.

We started our Junior umpire program in 2000, with just some hope, and our fingers crossed. In my son's first game, he was on the bases, and I had the plate, he had a close call at third. The manager in the box did not agree with his out call, and came to me first. "Not my call, Boss".

Then he went to my son, and got a little animated. Calls from parents ensued, for me to help my son out. Nothing doing.

Now, before the season started, we had a signal for our Juniors for when they'd had enough. The coaches knew it, too. It was folded arms across the chest. That meant ,"I've enough, the next word gets an EJ". Sure enough, my son folded his arms, and the manager stepped back, and headed back to the dugout.

After the game, the manager approached us both. "Here we go" I thought.

"Young man, I still don't agree with your call", he said to my son,"but really liked how you handled yourself out there. Nice job."

That's when I knew we could make this work.

And this whole program has little to do with umpiring and/or baseball. It's all about responsibility, respect and dealing with tough situations. For kids this age, you just can't find a better vehicle to learn these lessons.


I always have three questions for my kids, when they come off the field:

What did you do right? (always start with something positive)
What did you do wrong? (then, bring them back down to Earth. They'll know, if they've been trained right, when they mess up)
What do you need to do to fix it? (give them something to work on for next game).

Try those after his first game.

Could not agree with you more. I started umpiring at 13 and learning the ability to keep a level head while adults did not continues to help me to this day.

So glad you are going out to support your son. Twenty years ago when I started (and still today) my parents come to games when they can. As a teenager my dad would always stand out beyond the outfield fence (60' ball), not to hide, but to help me know that I was loud enough behind the plate. Mom always sat in the bleachers and cheered for everyone. She just loves watching kids play sports. Many times she would be asked, "Which one is your son?" when the parents didn't recognize her. She always happily said, "He is" while pointing at me (usually behind the plate).

I wish your son the best of luck. Starting young is AWESOME!

How did his first game go for him this weekend? And how did go for you watching him umpire?

It went well. He had a lot of fun. He was doing 6-7yr old coach pitch. The usual stuff. Lots of running and not many outs. Everyone hits with free substitutions. Couple of times runners passed runners. Not a lot of calls to make just keep the kids running the right directions. His trainer says "I feel like I am robbing the park every time I get paid for one of these games."

His trainer says he needs to be louder but other than that he is ready to fly solo next week. The plan is he will do this group through the fall and move to 8-9yrs old in the spring.

Like Kyle, I started a youth umpiring program for our local LL back when I was involved with LLBB. We started them the same way, at 12 yo in our coach pitch division and they moved up a higher division each year. If they stayed with the program, which included mandatory attendance at a four hour clinic each spring, by the time they were 14, they were calling games in our 11/12 yo majors division. Program worked well, had 100% backing of the league's BOD, parent's of our young umpires were amazed at the poise and confidence they developed right before their eyes.
Of everything I've done as an umpire, the seven years I spent running this program was by far the most fun and rewarding.
I wish your son the all the best in his development as an umpire.

This was my sons second weekend umpiring. Coach disagreed with my sons rule interpretation. Son told him that he wasn't wrong and get back in the dugout. Coach sent his wife to get his rule book out of the car. Then he called time out and wanted to show my son the rule book. My son told him he could return to the dugout and they weren't discussing his rule book. So proud of him.
My wife's reaction was "can you believe that guy...he sent his wife to get his rule book" " I would have told him to shut up and get your own rule book."

I have a suggestion for you and your son. It might be a good idea to teach him to allow a manager to show him a rule in the rule book, even if he's confident that he's 100% right on the ruling. I don't normally recommend allowing a manager to pull the rule book out on the field, but I think that for a 14 year old umpire, it will help keep him out of trouble. As soon as he tells the manager that he's not going to be discussing the rule book, in the manager and other coaches eyes, he just told them that he doesn't want to be bothered with the facts.

There are ways he can allow a manager to use a rule book during a rules discussion without having to stand there and take a lot of crap as the manager peruses the rule book looking for the rule that he "thinks" applies.

Manager - "Billy I think you needed to call time on this interference call on my second baseman. The ball was in left field when he interfered with the runner, and not calling time like the rule says, allows their runner to go to third. By rule he only gets the base he's going to when there's interference by the defense. I've got it right here in the rule book.

Billy - "Mr. Leftout, please show me the rule. I'll give you 15 seconds to find it. After that, we need to move on and get the game going. You have the option of filing a protest if you don't like my ruling, and can't find it yourself."


YMMV - And I'm sure Kyle's kids have had to deal with situations very similar to this.

Tim.

I do not agree with a coach bringing a rulebook out on the field under any circumstances. My son was faced with the same situation when he was 15 and he told the coach, "If you come out here with that book in your hand, we will not discuss anything and you will have to leave. Your team needs you, so I suggest that we meet after the game for your rules clinic.". The coach turned on his heals and headed to the dugout. He spotted me in the stands and said, "He's a chip off the old block!".

When a coach brings a rulebook out on the field, he is undermining the official. It doesn't matter if the official is 14 or he is the official for that game. He might be 14, but as an official, his ruling or call is final, just as mine would be.

Tim, I normally agree with you, but this is horrible advice. Except for the youngest ages of players (not umpires), I'm dumping any coach that brings a rule book to me to question a call. A coach has three options if he doesn't like a situation: (1) Protest, (2) Shut up, (3) Get ejected. For the younger years, I can see the dad/coach not knowing how bad of a situation it is, and will warn him to take the book back.

If his son wants to say "Coach, you need to go back to the bench and find the rule yourself. If you really feel I'm wrong now, you can file a protest before I put the ball back in play."

You and I, as well as most of the partners we work with, have the luxury of "appearing" to be seasoned umpires when we step on the field. And I think that's why we don't get too much crap when we send a coach back to his bench to NOT bring the rule book out again, or depending on the level of play, we can send him to the showers, parking lot, or Lazy Boy and Budweiser for the rest of the day if they pull one out at all.

I don't know that it works that way for a 14 year old kid.

Tim.

But, for the 14-year old to be really effective, and in-charge on the field, it HAS to work that way; and the BOD or other "Higher Authority" HAS to back him up.

Otherwise, the 14 year old ump will be steamrollered on a regular basis by "adult" rats, with and without Rulebooks in tow.

This is the toughest part of having teenagers officiate: getting both them and the adults used to the concept that the teens are IN CHARGE and due the exact same deference that an adult doing the same job is entitled to [and demands] as a matter of course.

Hey, if the Rat has a problem with the rules, he could always protest!

I was doing a 12 yr select game one time with a R2 only We had a CI and I advanced the runner to 3B as from behind the plate it looked like trying a steal. Most likely the reason for the interference. The batter hit a little dribbler to F4 and was out on the play. After calling time, I gave the offense their option on the play. Naturally they took runners at 3B and 1B. The defense was certain that R2 had to return to 2B as the ball became dead on the play.

He was cordial about it. No big demonstration. Later on his wife returned to the field with a rule book. He came to me between innings with it and pointed out the rule citation in Rule 7. I then took the book from him and flipped to Rule 6.

I got a thank you very much, and now I know for sure.

I would hope you're giving these kids some rules knowledge as well as a test. I'm with Ozzy, no rule book on my field any age. If I was the kid, it would be hey coach, how did you do on that rules test, I got a 98.

The rule in question was a park rule specifically addressed in preseason coaches meeting AND umpire training. My son didn't need to see the rule book as he was able to quote it to the coach without reading it. The coach told him his interpretation was incorrect and my son told him that is how it was explained in the umpire meeting and that is how he was going to administer it.

My son reviewed the situation with his trainer after the game and his trainer told him he did just fine. Both for his interpretation and sending the coach back without reading the rule book.

I believe the NCAA rulebook states that a copy shall or should be at every game. When I was doing College ball, If I ejected a coach for bringing a rule boo,k I know I would have received a call from my assignor asking me what rule violation was the coach ejected for.

I agree that most Coaches intentions are to try an show up the official but, the fact that he came out on the field to discuss anything can be construed as that also. What does carrying a book or pad or anything else have to do with it.

There have been times when a coach has approached me with a rulebook and I savor the moment. Why? Because I get to actually display my knowledge of the rules and in my own devious way turn the cards on him and shows his *** up.

If getting respect were as easy as Aretha Franklin would lead us to believe, we'd all be singing on the Field.The most respected officials exude unpretentious confidence. They combine decisiveness, knowledge of the game, professionalism, well-developed social skills and a calm demeanor that communicates itself to players, coaches, officials and fans.

Of course, if I am approached in a disrespectful manner, I also will have to resort to the rules of removal alloted me in the rulebook. See Ya.

Maybe it's just semantics, but what I might say to said assignor is "I ejected him for not following an umpire directive." I get the point - nothing in the rule book says it can't be brought on the field - so it's more like:

"Skip, take that rulebook back to the dugout"
Skip keeps coming.
Whoosh.

He's been given a 'direct order,' if you will, and chooses to continue violating. So that's why he goes.

I don't know the NCAA rulebook, so I won't argue the 'shall keep a copy' part, but I would venture to guess there's no written specific that forces an umpire to look at it when the coach trots it out, or even specifies where the copy has to be - if it's in the bottom of your gear bag, back in the change room, well, there you go.

The MLB book states umpires should keep the book with them at all times. Do you walk onto a field with it in your back pocket?

I believe it also says the umpire should carry a resin bag out to the pitcher's mound before the start of every game.

For what it's worth, LL rules also state that the umpire shall carry the book.

Yeah, that's not happening.

Why did you work for an assignor who had never umpired?

Not any more. I think this was changed 3-5 years ago.

It's worse sometimes. I worked for a college assignor who umpired for many years. As soon as he became the assignor he immediately started taking the side of the rats to show them and the conference commissioner that he wasn't an apologist for the umpires.

Never walked on the field anywhere with it in my back pocket, nor did I imply that anyone should.

But just in case you couldn't get the crux of what I was saying, try this.

If your ego lacks the self confidence as an official that a coach walking on the field with a rule book is so totally offensive to you that your "dumping any coach that brings a rule book to me to question a call", then your part of the problem and not the solution. Unapproachable, arrogant, and just not cut out to be a good official.

Notice I also prefaced it by saying this doesn't apply to the "youngest ages of players." My point is that a coach of a teen-aged team knows better than to bring a rule book on the field. He's getting a warning, then he's getting ejected if he doesn't put the book back in his pocket or on the bench.

If he wants to discuss the way I handled a situation, that's great. Let's discuss it. If he then still feels like I didn't follow the rules, he can protest the game at that point. Bringing a rule book to me does nothing but give the appearance that I don't know what I'm doing.

Would you like it if your boss paraded your department's SOPs through the office before stopping at your desk, then spending 5 minutes telling you (in a voice where everyone can hear) that you're doing your job incorrectly?

I'll ignore the personal attacks.

The assignor was very experienced.

You would understand were I was coming from, if you ever had to sit on a disciplanary committee that recommended wether any more action should be taken against someone that was ejected from a contest, or if the ejection was sufficient.

You have to determine the degree of the rule infraction that was violated and whether or not the official acted within his/hers authority so provided in the rulebook also. I have seen coaches and players receive additional games, suspended and sometimes removed from the league.

By the same token, it is sometimes hard to make these decisions when you have an official that abuses his/hers authority, or provokes the action for which you would like to discipline someone for. Believe, me the assignor will be one of the first that get a phone call and we all know what flows downhill.

I have been in both positions and have always stood behind my officials but sometimes some officials can make that very difficult. That was my point.

I empathize with you, but if that was your point, you failed.

depends on how the coach does it. Normally, they do it in a way to show up the umpire and that gets them dumped.
One coach I know would have just a small rules page on his clipboard and quietly walk over and make it look like he's doing a lineup change or some other administrative stuff, and he does it in a perfectly civil and discreet manner and only does it occasionally, never gets ejected or warned. Even better is he keeps the technique to himself so no one else in the park has a clue that he's questioning a rule :D

I agree and I would think that the owner of the quote would too however I was reponding to the qoute literaly.