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If I'm the coach, and it's a critical point in the game, I call timeout and ask the calling official what he called. Most likely, the calling official will quote the proper rule and the infraction simply wasn't seen by the coach. If the official doesn't know the rule, ask for a conference with his partner(s). If they determine that an error had been made, they MIGHT give you the ball back and if you're really lucky, they might not charge the timeout.
If this situation happened in my game, I would use my elastic power to overturn the call and give the team the ball back, and I would most likely ask the coach if he still wanted the TO. I would then bring the coaches together, explain the situation and resume play. In my opinion, we have an obligation to get plays right and be fair, it is a cop out when a situation is fixable to say, "Sorry coach, we screwed up, but we're going with it anyhow." Common sense is key here.
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